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  • About Me

    Image of westwind

    westwind

    Male, 53
    NC, USA
    Member since April 27, 2008

    • About Me

      I'm just trying to get through this thing called life with a little bit of sanity along the way. Will the mission be accomplished? Jury still out!

      I'm just trying to get through this thing called life with a little bit of sanity along the way. Will the mission be accomplished? Jury still out!

    • Interests

      I enjoy eating out, movies, plays, music and reading. I love to swim and garden. Being able to plant something and watch it grow is such a joy. I love getting my hands dirty and the earthy aroma of the soil places me in a special kind of heaven.

      I enjoy eating out, movies, plays, music and reading. I love to swim and garden. Being able to plant

  • Recent Activity

    Recently:

    • 6 journal posts, 2 hugs received

    Thursday

    Monday

    • westwind wrote a journal entry: Thanks again God! 8:56am

      For allowing me to get through four hours of hell and not placing my hands around his neck and tightening…  
    • westwind wrote a journal entry: Is it possible??? 12:46am

      To have your Friday the 13th two days later on Sunday the 15th? I thought Sunday were designed as a day…  
  • Journal

    • Yellow little pills

      Mood November 19, 2009 1:10am

      Thank you God for giving mankind the ability to make sleeping pills! They finally came and sanded the kitchen floor yesterday and without those …

    • Take this job and shove it! I don't work here no more.

      Mood November 19, 2009 12:55am

      Well, in another nine hours and I'm through. then a week off and transfer to new home takes place...yahoo! I will miss the guys...all but one and …
    • Thanks again God!

      Mood November 16, 2009 8:56am

      For allowing me to get through four hours of hell and not placing my hands around his neck and tightening them as much as I can. God, this guy is a …
    • Is it possible???

      Mood November 16, 2009 12:46am

      To have your Friday the 13th two days later on Sunday the 15th? I thought Sunday were designed as a day of rest?

       

      I guess you're a tad like …

    • Thank you...

      Mood November 16, 2009 12:43am

      God for giving me the strength to get through my shift yesterday without slapping him into the middle of next week, along with a couple of other …

    Read Journal

  • Hugbook

    Give westwind a hug



    • Rainbow

      From Ita Tuesday

      Just passing! Your prescence on the earth brightens up my life. xoxox

    • Celebration

      From Ita November 14

      Congratulations on your transfer! xoxox

    • Gold Star

      From Ita November 7

      Just passing, & wanted to remind you of how wonderful you are. xoxo

    • Hug

      From Ita November 1

      Thanks for the hug. I've just returned from house-sitting for a friend. Enjoyed the change of scenery! We do celebrate Halloween over here, but personally I don't, for reasons of faith. I'm very well, Jon. Thanks for asking. xoxoxo

    • Chocolate

      From jk54cat October 31

      Happy Halloween to you and Zeus! Don't let the crazies get you!
      Hugs,
      Jan

    Read Hugbook

  • Goals

    Progress

    90 %

    Distance (miles)
    0

    Progress

    70 %

    Distance (miles)
    0

    Progress

    60 %

    Distance (miles)
    100
    View all in progress Goals

    Progress

    10 %

    Distance (miles)
    0

    Progress

    0 %

    Goal End Date is Sep 30, 09 52 days ago.
    Distance (miles)
    100
    by miles (miles)
    10
    Goal Completed on Sep 28, 08
  • Support Groups

    • Close TMJ

      I haven't been given an offical answer to my medical problem as of yet but the sixith and hopefully final doctor mentioned something about TMJ. I didn't believe it at first but now that I have gotten informed have altered my thinking. I doubt it was the original cause of my problems but I feel that it is the end result. I haven't been able to eat or bite into solid food since 1/10/08 and I crave for something solid. I can eat things that are very thin and can be slid between my teeth or food blended in a food processor. Thank God I can still get my daily chocolate fix! I just had an MRI and waiting for results on the sixth of May. I'm having a difficult time getting my head around not being able to do something so fundamental. Is this ever going to end?

    • Close Gay Men's Challenges

      Well, I wanted to join this group to see if anyone out there is feeling as isolated as I am? I live in a very small town in the south and any/or all of the other gay members of the community are in relationships, old men or too young for my tastes. Nothing wrong with those two groups of men but if your living single and horny as hell it sucks! BIG TIME. I do have plans of relocating to the Southwest within the next year or so and hope to break out of this isolation once and for all.

    • Open Financial Challenges

      I filed bankruptcy...Chapter Seven back in 1997, discharged in 1998 and I'm still not certain if I did the right thing. I haven't the courage to review my credit report but still get turned down flat when applying for loans. With recent medical expenses screwing up my finances I'm facing the possibility of repeating the same thing, either that...say the hell with all of this and hit the road without paying my bills. The latter has more appeal this time around.

      Treatments

      Budgeting Not Working
      Just too many expenses for it to really work. Have elimanted all unnecessary spending for years and it still doesn't seem to help.
      Credit Counseling Not Working
      I spoke with them prior to filing bankruptcy and it just didn't seem the right avenue to travel...too much in debt.
      Cut Up Credit Cards Somewhat Helpful
      It worked for a while before filing bankruptcy and waited about a year and a half after being discharged to apply for more cards, although they were willing to send me applications up the yazoo. Now, I have run them up again, doing my best to pay them off once again, they have raised my credit limit on two of the cards. Only use them for emergency spending. Trying to avoid using and will save any unused balances for my escape from this dreadful town.
      Debt Consolidation Not Working
      I just recently tried getting a consolidation loan and was turned down. Pissed me off, much easier to make one payment per month instead of eight. They offered to loan me $500.00..."will that help you out?", I don't think so asshole!
      Earn Money Working / Worked
      There was a time when I was working four jobs at a time. I was able to save some money for a while but after a few months it got to be too much and I was wearing myself too thin and decided that life was just to damn short to be doing this to myself. Well, once again I'm working too much...just to make ends meet, 80 to 116 hours per work week and it hasn't nor will help with meeting all of the new medical bills that are piling up. Plus all of the overtime is coming to an end.
      Filing for Bankruptcy Working / Worked
      Filed ten years ago and am still trying to figure out if I made the right move. After filing it took six months for me to get that emotional monkey off my back and to be able to relax. I still have a fear of phones at home. I don't answer my phone anymore, let the machine get it. Even thou creditors aren't calling and haven't called in over ten years, some things die hard...if ever.
      Holding a Garage Sale Working / Worked
      I had auctions to sell my things in order to meet financial obligations to the government. Have sold other items privately and through other auctions just to keep afloat. It helps for a while but the money always runs out faster than expected.
    • Open Homelessness

      Well, I'm not there yet but starring it straight in the face come next year. It was suppose to happen the first of the year 2008 but was delayed until 2009. I'm scared shitless at times and it becomes so overwhelming that I think I'm headed for a melt down. Thank God I have Zeus or I wouldn't be here!

    • Open Alcoholism

      I have been cocktail free for almost 24 years and during that time there have only been three times when I was really tempted to drink. The first was back in 96 and I realized that I was going to lose my restaurant and poured four fingers of Absolut. Battle lasted 45 minutes but I won. The two other times have been within the past three months. Once to help me with physical pain and the last one...today with the crap at the doctors. Still sober but give me strength!

      Treatments

      12 Step Program Working / Worked
      It worked but had a very hard time with the term or word God...at the time!
      AA Meetings Working / Worked
      It worked but had a very hard time with the term God...at the time!
      Al-Anon Working / Worked
      Worked, one meeting empowered me to put my two alcoholic parents and their problems behind me and move to Boston.
      Willpower Working / Worked
      Worked! I had the before and after picture to look at. My Mom went to rehab and made it, my Dad continued drinking, eventually entered rehab but on way home stopped and picked up a bottle of whiskey...dead within a year!
    • Open Depression
      Type: Clinical (Major) Depression

      I have been suffering with depression on and off for many decades. Sometimes it is very hard for me to realize that I'm depressed and other times I can feel it coming on. Not sure which is worse not realizing or watching it encompass and engulf my life.

      Treatments

      Effexor Working / Worked
      Currently using and seems to be working the best.
      Elavil Working / Worked
      Worked for a while but then it petered out.
      Lexapro Working / Worked
      Worked for a while, but it (depression) became to over powering and thoughts of suicide were overwhelming.
      Psychotherapy Working / Worked
      It helped when I was doing it but it always became a financial luxury and had to cease.
    • Open Mental Challenged

      I work with developmentally disabled adults and find the work very interesting, aggravating...at times, challanging and fulfilling.

    • Open Menopause

      First of all, I'm male, secondly I believe that I'm going through some sort of male menopause. I have terrible sleep sweats that started right after I turned fifty. It also started when I switched jobs and began working third shift, but on my time off I go back to a normal sleep pattern and still have them. Some times I'm totally drenched in sweat, even the back of my knees are soaking wet, other times just my head and chest area. Not sure about any other symptoms of menopause.

    • Open Insomnia

      I suffer from insomnia quite a bit, more so now that I have switched to working third shift, but that's been over 18 months ago and still find it difficult to sleep. It's a bitch.

      Treatments

      Ambien Working / Worked
      helps
      Halcion Working / Worked
      it worked but it really screwed me up so quit
      Lavender Working / Worked
      tried but didn't work that well, just stank the place up
      Reading Working / Worked
      helps clear my head before falling asleep
    • Open Anxiety

      I have suffered from anxiety on and off for most of my life. At times it really affects my everyday activities and outlook and coping skills. I'm facing another round right now and trying very hard to keep it managable and under wraps.

      Treatments

      St. John\'s Wort Working / Worked
      Valium Working / Worked
      used a few years ago and it helped and the got off it because I was tired of taking so many different medications.
      Xanax Working / Worked
      this eems to help a great deal, it really allows me to fall asleep when too wound up with worry and anxiety.
    • Open Migraine Headaches

      I have suffered from headaches all my life but it wasn't until 1984 that the migraines started. I was involved in a car accident and my head hit the rear-view mirror during impact and ever since then I've had headaches. At first I thought they were sinus headaches and tried that medication but it stopped working, then I just suffered through them as best as possible. I use to get cluster migraines that would last 12-16 days and then get a day off only to start the cycle all over again.

      Treatments

      Imitrex Working / Worked
      God's gift to my sanity and wellbeing!
    • Open Healthy Sex

      There is no story because there is no sex! Been three years since last romp, well, had one a few weeks ago, but worst experience I've ever had. Never climaxed, let alone got hard, all I got was a painful back. And I don't consider it a sexual encounter...and for that I had to wait three years?

      Treatments

      Patience Not Working
      I don't know how much longer I can be patient to enjoy the wonderful sensation of making love, feeling the warmth of another naked man beside me. Need to get out of here and fast.
    • Open Stress Management

      Stressed-out is my middle name! It's generally the little things that send me off. I have a tendency to bottle things up and then every 10-20 years just blow! Not healthy I know but hate losing control and having to yell. Hate confrontation!

      Treatments

      Music Working / Worked
      Sometimes it works, use to work better years ago, but must have gotten use to it by now.
    • Open Seasonal Affective Disorder

      It took me a long time to figure out what was going on with me during the winter months. I grew up in Michigan and not seeing the sun for 5-6 months made my life absolutely miserable. I finally figured it out and moved south where winter consists of temps in the 40-50's and sunny for at least 5 days a week. But cloudy or rainy days have really started to affect me and my willbeing...even if just for a day.

    • Open Senior Health & Aging
      Type: Aches & Pains

      Well, according to what I have just read I'm too young to be considered old, but to be honest that's just how I feel. I'm fifty-two and feel old and tired, depressed and a sense of gloom about getting older and being able not to retire. I try to keep active but my work schedule is terrible and my finances don't allow me the extra funds to have a social life.

      Treatments

      Pets Working / Worked
      I have my best buddy...Zeus, he's part German shepherd/wolf. He keeps me active with walks and companionship. He will be by my side when I become homeless within the next year. I take better care of him than I do of myself, he is my reason for living.
      Socializing Working / Worked
      Works when it can happen but it doesn't happen very much. My work schedule, finances and possibility of meeting people within my age bracket are very slim where I live. I do volunteer work but the social outlet for that is very narrow. I need to move from NC and have set my sights on September 09!?
    • Open Loneliness

      I've been alone most of my life. At first it was extremely difficult but after several decades I've gotten use to being alone...sad. All attempts to correct situation have gotten nowhere fast.

    • Open GERD & Heartburn

      I was just informed last week that I have GERD and a hiatial hernia and thought I would join my fellows and see if I can get any help with this medical issue.

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