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dreadaffodil 
3:37pm, August 26, 2008
I've been trying to forget my problems in my on going effort to stay positive and productive. I guess at some point, you have to remember and reflect on what's really going on. Today is a reality check. What the fuc_ when is life going to give me a break. All my money that I make is going into this bottom less pit to help my mother pay her bills. I'm sharing the one car we have which makes it impossible for me to work more, so that we might catch up financially. I have to take time off from work to take my mother to her appointments. I'm an errand girl.... I'm a mother... I'm a chronic pain girl...a cataract... a rare eye disease that requires cortisone shots in my eye...I'm unable to focus on my recovery and my own life. But I have to stay optimistically durable and self less. On a more positive note: I won't be broke forever....the lights are still on. At least I have a car to share and I don't have to take the bus. My mother took care of me now it's my turn to take care of her. Maybe a car will fall from heaven and land in my drive way. ha hah I wish ! I'm healthy enough to run errands. Mom will get better, and will eventually get her disability and workmen’s comp payments and her lawsuit money. Then I'll be able to live my life and go back to school. This pain can't last forever. There's surgery available for cataracts. I'm not blind. Tomorrows another day. Tomorrows the first day of the rest of my life. What doesn't kill me makes me stronger and of course more compassionate. God give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
UPDATED GOALS
staying sober
491 days sober
Encouragements: 2
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