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e4now 
its 927am im nervous about my dr appointment with my med dr....my tummy is in knots
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its 109pm i cut 7 times this morning b4 my appointment with my med dr....they moved the damn bus stop so i panicked they cancelled my mondays therepy session im a daum mess and to top it all off a friend from therepy died yesterday of an apperant OD the dr uped my klonopin and he increased my porpanolol he said to take my geodon with dinner and the dream one right b4 bed along with the third dose of klonopin...so to sum it all up ive been taking my night meds all with dinner when i should have only been taking the geodon whatever live and learn.....im trying to relax ill call the pharmacy tomorrow to pick up my meds i am going to cut some more now i need to release sum energy....
e4now
ok i went to the gym tried to work out some energy....came home felt like shut so i started the shower then naired and cut ALOT....that release was just wat i needed i feel ok now....i just took my sleep med for the bad dreams now im going to bed...i still wish it was me that died yesterday but it wasnt it was the sweetest girl from therepy im sad not for her cuz shes in a better place just sad that it wasnt me i know im sick i know i need help i just need to hang on just fucken hang on till things get better for me the meds need to start working on these voices or im really gunna loose it
e4now