archangels's Journal

Firstly i,d like to apologise for not being on lately as you know i am not doing too great,sadly the lump in my stomach they cannot do anymore test,s because i haven,t been too well,with yet more chronic pain and infection,s and the doctor,s have said they do not want to upset my body with yet more test,s,i feel in all honestly really crap! and i just want the so called doctor,s to do there job,s and help me!! but cuz it,s me i,m at the back of the line,also i have had to get another laptop as my other one had a mega virus on it,surprise surprise clive want,s to help me when i allow him to look at my laptop a virus ended up crashing my computer,i asked a friend who is a computer geek to look at it he told me that the virus was put on manually and of course clive couldn,t have done it!!!yeah right! even my friend who doesn,t even know clive gave me the date the virus was put on and believe it or not it was put on when clive came to see me now there,s a surprise! right now i am angrier than i,ve ever been with my stbx,for someone who likes honesty he isn,t being very honest is he?

Well enough of me moaning on i,m hoping that within this week that i,ll have the test,s done to determine what the hell this lump is cuz it has now started getting bigger but i,m obviously not that important to this bunch of muppets! and yes i,m angry! i,m having problem,s with infection,s and the surgeon,s will not come near me while i,ve got a chronic infection,funny i didn,t have any infection,s when i first came in here so how come i,ve got it now? when i ask the doctor,s seem very vague and i,m getting very very frustrated with being stuck in this hospital with no where to go! i am now having an endoscopy on the 23rd june and i,m having a biopsy on the lump in my belly, sadly my friend george has some sort of crush on me and he wanted to come see me tonight but i told him,sorry i can,t  i,m so tired very quickly i think it,s cuz of frustration and these dammed infection,s,also george tends to sulk when he doesn,t get his way,he also keep,s calling me a tease which i have to be honest it really upset,s me cuz the pondlife scum who took me and hurt me kept calling me that and the one thing i ain,t is a tease!

I am having a bit of time to myself and i think being stuck in here certainally doesn,t help so before i depress any more of you,ll i,ll bid you goodnight and i pray that i,ll have some good news very soon,because if i,m honest i am scared about this lump because it doesn,t hurt me but it,s giving me all sort,s of symptom,s!! take care everyone and hopefully i,m on the up noe [fingers crossed!] love to you all shaz x