Journal Entry for September 9, 2008
September 9, 2008 4:12pm
Messed thois one up last night. Just like I mess everything up.
Progress
80 %
Goal End Date is Sep 11, 08 424 days ago.
pandora4150 
5:54pm
-
About Me
pandora4150
-
About Me
I am a 35 year old women who struggles almost daily with depression and self injury. I love young children and hope to go back to school one day to become a Pre School teacher. I have one brother who is the father of my adorable niece and nephew they are the light of my life. They are also one of the major reasons why I still fight the fight everyday. I want to watch them grow up and I want to be a big part of their lives forever. I have a very supportive family whom I love very much and would not be here today w/o there love and support. I have been through treatment for endometrial cancer and I had a hysterectomy in 06. The cancer is in remission and I am healthy again.
I am a 35 year old women who struggles almost daily with depression and self injury. I love young children and hope to go back to school one day to become a Pre School teacher. I have one brother who is the father of my adorable niece and nephew they are the light of my life. They are also one of the major reasons why I still fight the fight everyday. I want to watch them grow up and I want to be a big part of their lives forever. I have a very supportive family whom I love very much and would not
-
Interests
My interests involve spending time with my niece, nephew, and the rest of my family. I also enjoy shopping and spending time with my friends. My best friend lives 5 hours away so I go see her a lot. I like to travel and I like to help out in the community. I am currently investigating a volunteer opportunity at a local agency who works with both children and adults with disabilities.
My interests involve spending time with my niece, nephew, and the rest of my family. I also enjoy shopping
-
-
Recent Activity
Recently:
-
1 journal comment
Yesterday
-
pandora4150 updated their status 5:54pm
Had a postitive trip to the hospital and is home now. Feeling soo much...…
-
pandora4150 and Gyimah are now friends 3:30pm
-
pandora4150 updated their status 2:34pm
Had a postitive trip to the hospital and is home now. Feeling soo much...…
-
pandora4150 updated their status 2:11pm
Had a postitive trip to the hospital and is home now. Feeling soo much...…
-
pandora4150 updated their status 1:50pm
Had a postitive trip to the hospital and is home now. Feeling soo much...…
-
-
Journal
-
-
I can't take this anymore.
July 17, 2008 2:38pm
I don't know how much longer I can stand this. The urges are really strong and I feel like complete and utter crap. I wanna …
-
-
Hugbook
Little Love
I'm glad 2 hear from u. It's wonderful u have been able 2 seek medical attention & that it has been helpful. I'm extremely proud of u & the fact u haven't been cutting. I haven't cut n 2wks. It's a daily struggle, but what has given me the kick n the ass was that I started on chemo inj so if I con't cutting it was never going 2 heal. Your good news has lifted my spirits 2day. Best Wishes! Congratulations.
Flower
a hug and some flowers to say hi
-
Miss You
Have not heard from u n awhile. Hope all is well. I can totally relate 2 your personal struggles but I do not believe suicide is ever the answer. U will merely hurt your love 1's. Did your inpatient hospital stay help? How is the outpatient therapy going? I've been considering that. Have a festive w/e! Hope 2 hear from u soon. Thanks.
Little Love
just wanted to send you my love and hugs, honey xxx
Miss You
Thinking about u xxxxx
-
Photos
pandora4150 hasn’t uploaded any photos yet
-
Advertisement -
Goals
View all in progress Goals
-
Support Groups
Close Self-Injury
I started cutting when I was like 27 years old. I have had extended periods of time when I did not cut, but right now it is an everyday battle. I do b/c I like the high I get and also b/c it numbs the emotional pain. I want to stop I really do I just don't know how. It seems to be controlling my life right now and that scares me, so maybe I can get some help and support here.
Treatments
- Outpatient Treatment Program Working / Worked
- I have been in several outpatient programs. Some have helped and some have not. I think that the talking is a big thing for me. Just talking about things with people who understand and have been there, really helps. I just started an outpatient program today and it looks like it will be really helpful
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- I am in therapy on a weekly basis and it does help. I love my therapist. I trust her and she understands me. We have an excellent working reltionship. She is trying to help me with the cutting as well.
- Rubber Bands Working / Worked
- Rubber bands work for me. The only problem is I forget to put them on my wrist. There was a time when I just wore them on my wrist on a daily basis, but not right now. Maybe I will start again b/c they do help me.
- Squeezing Ice Working / Worked
- I tried the ice thing a couple of times. It seems to help a bit.
- Talking Working / Worked
- Talking has always been a good outlet for me. MAybe that is why therapy is so helpful.
Close Personality Disorders
Type: Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder when I was like 29. I have been in and out of hospitals since I was 27. I also struggle with self injury and depression
Treatments
- Dialectical Behavioral Therapy Working / Worked
- I am currently in DBT and I think its helping.
- Emotions Anonymous (EA) Not Working
- Talking Working / Worked
- Talking always helps me.
Open Hysterectomy
I had a hysterectomy in Nov of 06 b/c of Endometrial Cancer. I went through Chemo- Therapy and I have been cancer free for a year
