vlh2014's Journal

Allowing schools to test for scoliosis is very important and more important is to increase parent's awareness of the importance of early detection. Not only should parents be aware of the health risks, but they need to be aware of the psychological effects on their child(ren). If scoliosis is detected an early age, it is also important that schools provide follow-up. Both parent(s) and schools need to pay attention when children easily lose their balance and are labeled clumbsy. 

Went back to an orthopedist in late July (Dr. Joseph Zuhosky) and after going through the xray process.  Having what I remembered of my curves reconfirmed.  My spine looks like a really large and agitated reptile is a very small and confined space.  When the surgeon tells you there is nothing that can be done; it can really be very disappointing.  My right hand, wrist, arm and shoulder are also having problems - severe nerve damage and even with surgery, the nerve damage may not be corrected - actually what he said was that I would not regain all of the feeling and use of my hand.  There is also some damage to my left hand, although it is not as severe.  My back pain has gotten so much worse of late that sometimes I wonder ....  Working has always been a source of comfort, but lately, not so much.  I hurt more and more and am losing more and more control over the pain and body functions that sometimes all I want to do is cry or give up.  My basic nature will not let me give up and what is the point of crying.  Thank God for pets.

I know that there are others in so much worse condition than I, but when it is you, it is oftentimes hard to redirect your thoughts to others that are in worse condition.  It does not help when some healthcare personnel wonder after seeing your xrays how do you keep going or how are you still alive.  Yet, I want someone to understand the many emotions that I feel.  Fighting for the right to be alive sometimes is as important as being alive - above ground and knowing that both are true.