God opens the door
March 12, 2008 4:58pm
. It sucks when you feel like you are a part of something, and they care about you, but it is not always true. I just try to keep reminding myself …
babe2 
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About Me
babe2
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About Me
I have been married for 22 yrs. & have a beautiful almost 18 yr. old daughter. I have a step-daughter, son-in=law and two of the most beautiful g-daughters. My hubby is f-t in army & will retire 10-1-07. I work for an Opthamologist as an unlicensed optician. need to get on that, I have 2 cats who make life so much easier. they love you no matter what. It scares me that my baby will be leaving for college soon. I have never felt more alone in my life. since mom passed 1-10 i cry almost every day
I have been married for 22 yrs. & have a beautiful almost 18 yr. old daughter. I have a step-daughter, son-in=law and two of the most beautiful g-daughters. My hubby is f-t in army & will retire 10-1-07. I work for an Opthamologist as an unlicensed optician. need to get on that, I have 2 cats who make life so much easier. they love you no matter what. It scares me that my baby will be leaving for college soon. I have never felt more alone in my life. since mom passed 1-10 i cry almost every day
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Interests
cats, art, jewelry, bellydancing
cats, art, jewelry, bellydancing
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Recent Activity
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Journal
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Journal Entry for January 25, 2008
January 25, 2008 6:13pm
As some of you already know, I have been away for awhile to get myself help. I have been stuffing and stuffing all of my feelings for over 8 years, …
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Journal Entry for January 7, 2008
January 7, 2008 11:14pm
I am counting the days till the 1 year mark of mom's passing. I have been so rock-bottom depressed, feel absolutly worthless, useless,that …
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Journal Entry for January 3, 2008
January 3, 2008 7:36pm
Another day goes by and I still feel so down. It's like I am in a bottomless pit and I haven't the strength to climb up anymore. No matter …
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Journal Entry for January 1, 2008
January 1, 2008 6:51pm
Happy New Year!!!! We stayed in last night. We went out to eat early to miss the crowds, then headed home.Today I have spent mostly in bed. I am so …
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Hugbook
Ray of Sunshine
heres some sunshine to put into your life huggies to you
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Hug
HERE ARE HUGGIES FOR YTOU HOPE YOU ARE FEELING GOOD. YOUR FRIEND JOAN
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Hug
HERE ARE HUGGIES FOR YOU. HOPE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL STRESS FREE WWEEKEND
Prayer
I hope an angel of love visits you today and whispers in your ear that God hears you every time you pray. I hope an angel of peace visits you tonight and touches your soul, inspiring dreams that are as bright as star light. I hope an angel of mercy visits you tomorrow and mends your heart, taking away all of your pain and sorrow. I hope an angel of light visits you every day bringing you endless joy and hope for the sunshine that's on the way~Love, Maria
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Hug
huggies for you. have a great weekend
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Photos
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Support Groups
Close Multiple Myeloma
Stage: IIImy mom was diagnosed w/ mm in july of 2006. we could never get any dr.s to tell us which stage mom was in. I guess it was the worst because we lost her 1-10-2007 at least God gave me those last few months to love and care for her. I just wish i could keep from crying. it's just hurts so freaking bad. I know she is in abetter place, but i miss her.
Treatments
- Dexamethasone Working / Worked
- the chemo worked, her blood and urine tests kept getting better, but her immune system was so bad it was like taking 2 steps forward and 3 sideways.
- Revlimid Not Working
- Velcade Not Working
Close Bereavement
Type: Loss of a ParentI just lost my mom to multiple myeloma on jan. 10,2007. I still miss her and I cannot keep from crying. My husband has been such a tremendoud help thru this , but now it seem he feels like I am suppost to be over this and iam not! mom was only diagnosed in july of '06 and lasted 6 months, which most were spent in the hospital. i really thought we would have her around at least several more years. that is what's so shocking. I know she's in heaven, but i wish so much i could have a sign.
Treatments
- Crying Too Soon to Tell
- i have only had a few days that i did not cry. otherwise i cannot quit!!!
- Grief Counseling Considering
- i think i need it.
- Prayer Somewhat Helpful
- I pray, and my chuch family has kept me in their prayers, as well as my other friends. i know prayer works.
- Psychotherapy Considering
- Sleep Working / Worked
- when i sleep, i usually dont think of her-except the 2 concecutive dreams i had where mom was having a baby?! on the 2nd dream, i saw the baby--perfect, but stillborn.
Open TMJ
I HAVE HAD TMJ FOR SO LONG I CAN'T REMEMBER WHEN IT ALL STARTED--LIKE 15-20 YRS AGO. I EVEN HAD A DOUBLE CONDOLOTOMY (BROKE MY JAW ON BOTH SIDES TO LET THEM EASE BACK INTO PLACE W/O MESSING W/ THE JOINT). THAT DID NOT HELP THE PAIN. I NEED HELP W/ THIS THING, TOO!!!!
Treatments
- Mouthguard Not Working
- I HAVE A DOZEN OF THESE---OUPPER,LOWER, HARD,SOFT, ETC.
Open Fibromyalgia
DIAGNOSED IN 1991, STILL CANT FIND OUT WHAT TO DO FOR IT.
Open Depression
i have been depressed most of my 47 yrs. of life. some days are better than others. my concern is that my mom and sister have been diagnoised w/ manic depression---does that mean i have that kind??? I have been on zoloft for awhile and it seems to do ok. i even double up the 10 days before my period, so i'm not too much of a high riding bitch.
Treatments
- Zoloft Somewhat Helpful
- it seems to help ok, and i up the dose 10 days before my period---so i don;t turn into lizzie borden.
- Effexor Not Working
- hated it---made me fat, too.
- Elavil Not Working
- i could not get out of the bed. that stuff makes me like a ragdoll
- Lexapro Not Working
- i just remember it didn't help.
- Prozac Somewhat Helpful
- this worked ok for me
- Psychotherapy Considering
Open Migraine Headaches
i started getting the headaches my last trimester of pregnancy in 1989. i think my hormones are the main cause of these.
Treatments
- Relpax Working / Worked
- this rx has been great
Open Hypothyroidism
another thing i have wrong w/ me. i am on levoxyl, which was doubled over 6 months ago. what is the armour stuff you guys are talking about. will it help me?
Treatments
- Synthroid Somewhat Helpful
Open Infidelity
this is about my parents. my mom just died 1-10-07, and 1 week after the funeral, my dad told my sister that he had been seeing someone. he kept saying how much he misses mom and there will never ever be another like her and he wishes she were still here. but now, he and his 'friend' plan to marry. this was to happen in may, but is now moved up to april, just a few days from my mother's birthday. this is a 2nd marriage for my dad, i'm not sure about the friend.
