angelsfly's Journal

Journal Entry for January 27, 2009
Tuesday, January 27, 2009

January 27th.   Its a Tuesday.     It has been really bitterly cold here on the plains of Colorado.    We got some snow.  But it was not very much.   Just enough to make the roads a bit wet and now its melting a bit.  Its just the cold that is alful and bitter.    Lets see whats been happening.   Not much.   My foot and my back of course are hurting.   My left foot my bunion is bohtering me alot for  the past 2 days.   I was watching news and some woman gave birth to 8 babies?   Wow thats a whole family in one pregnancy.    Then I remembered that I had to call the lawyer to find out about my ssi case going to US district court to basically ask for another hearing with a different judge.     I called and got his receptionist/secratary?    Asked her to look up my case and see what is happening.   I got permission granted for a new hearing for ssi!WOW  was I surprised!  Now what????  I was told it could take 6 months to a year for them to schudule my new hearing.    Thats a long wait.   But it truly did surpraise me alot.   I was sure that they would have denied me a 2nd chance to have a new hearing.   Now how am I suppose to be prepared for this one hearing????   I dont got a clue.    My lawyer told me to keep all my doctors appointments.     The only reason I have not gone to the Mental health place is because of lack of funds.     Sure they give me a discount for each session costs 15.00 dollars.    It adds up after several weeks.   I only get 200.00 a month.   Now that our gas bill has shot up so high to keep this house warm....I help to pay the gas bill to keep warm.   Cold bothers me alot and it makes my pain worsen.    The mental health place says that I am not depressed and have had progress.     I live with my Parents and Im unemployed and have no friends.     I dont go in for sessions with them for the lack of funds to pay them.   Then if you dont pay them they throw you to collectors who call and harass you until you pay in full the bill.    How am I suppose to attend Mental health sessions and pay the gas bill at the same time?    I choose to stay warm in the winter  is this wrong?    The mental health place says that Im not depressed.    Then why do I isolate myself and cry all the time?    Why  do I not trust anyone?   My pain has taken over my whole exsistance on this earth.     Im glad that Im going to get another hearing.   But I dont know what I can do that would benefit me at this hearing so that I wont be denied SSI again.   Any advise  I will take because I am diffiently doing something wrong.   Love to all my friends here.  You mean alot to me.   I know that I have not been sending out tons of hugs.   But what can I say.   Winter and the cold and my situation in my life.   I cant blame anyone for my problems.   I have to take full responsibility for my situation.    I guess I did not take good care of myself and now chronic pain has entered my life for the 2nd time and this time its here to stay.

UPDATED GOALS

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Comments

1. 

   Congratulations!! Getting a new hearing is great news. I know the "wheels" of govt. take a very long time to turn... but at least it gives you some hope and something positive to focus on in the future. I hope your spirits are lifted a little in any case.
   Sending hugs and smiles for you, take care... xxx

   
   

   GTK

2. 

   Yes Congrats on the SSI hearing. It is good news that you are going to court about it. That is one step closer to being on it. You have my prayers on this.

   
   

   bbbb

3. 

   Glad to hear the good news. Your lawyer should be able to advise you on how the next hearing will go. Wish I had some advice but I don't. Just hang in there, they may have the hearing much earlier than you think.
   Hugs and feel better,
   Gabby

   
   

   gabbygal

4. 

   keep a journal explaining why you could not aford to go to your mental health appointments. Apply for state medicaid NOW! You can get approved before getting SSDI or SSI. You are depressed. You obviously have not had enough visits to mental health to be diagnosed properly. Praying for you hon. Great news that you got that new hearing. I will pray for you to get a compassionate judge.
   Love you...Rhonda

   
   

   rrowley

5. 

   Congrats on the new hearing date. If the mental health place says that you are not depressed than what is their explanation to your symptoms? If they do not have one, then see if you can talk to another doctor once your funds are being sucked up by the cost of heating. Good luck!

   
   

   trishbug

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