Progress
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mollybees 
3:32pm, October 4, 2009
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About Me
mollybees
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About Me
I am 56-3/4 years old - born near Philly, grew up in NJ, lived in CA, OR, WA, PA.. I am married, 30 years, with loving dogs. I have a history of many years of depression, anxiety, PTSD (and assorted labels) and now many physical issues. My life has never been "normal" but it was out of control for better part of last 25 years.
I am 56-3/4 years old - born near Philly, grew up in NJ, lived in CA, OR, WA, PA.. I am married, 30 years, with loving dogs. I have a history of many years of depression, anxiety, PTSD (and assorted labels) and now many physical issues. My life has never been "normal" but it was out of control for better part of last 25 years.
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Interests
Love our/my friends, our dogs, antiquing, and little sentimental things. I enjoy: finding an antique shop we have never been in, good flea markets, historical homes, lakes, mountains, ferries, dream of being creative, chocolate and COFFEE. I love my siblings but sad we are so far apart - in more than just distance! I miss the family connections.
Love our/my friends, our dogs, antiquing, and little sentimental things. I enjoy: finding an antique
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Recent Activity
Recently:
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3 journal comments, 2 journal posts, 1 hug given
Yesterday
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mollybees changed their mood to Bad 2:51am
Thursday
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mollybees changed their mood to OK 12:37am
Tuesday
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mollybees changed their mood to Bad 11:10pm
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mollybees gave lindamae a little love 10:43pm
You are loved! Always remember that, OK? I wish I could have sent a bunch of different symbols all at…
October 27
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Journal
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Hugbook
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Hug
Oh my, your area sounds like something from a novel...yet you are living in it.
We have been out in the country for 22 years! We have farms around a a few grand homes that were built a few years ago. A winery, some filbert nut farms, a berry packing plant, a wheat farmer...most people keep to themselves but are there if you need them. Just a few miles up the road and we are at a shopping center where one is more anonymous.
Now, we are moving to a villa that is attached on one wall to another! No more hanging out on the deck in my PJ's!!! ha ha ha. There is still the privacy of one's indoor space. I always like the comfort of my own home. Since what I like to do, entertain, cook, read, etc.. is pretty low-key, I am thinking we will fit in fine. My brother's friends are mostly from either the boating or golfing (or both) set and he belongs to a country club. Not my style. I think that we will make our own set of friends and maybe we'll have some overlap. I've always been kindof picky about who I "really" consider a friend. Who wants to waste time pretending to like people! I know that sounds snobby, but so be it! Mac has an easier time of being friendly. We are an interesting pair, huh?
well, time to go and eat something...get my shower and then get packing. I want to "kids' room" to be packed up before Mazie gets here Thursday. It will be easier than having her want to "help." We have fun things planned...like taking Teddy to the kennel for a bath in the groom room!
many hugs and keep smiling sweetie bug...life is too dang short! Saying that reminds me how angry I was the other day...passing a church that always has these didactic quotes on it's signage. It said something like, "Depression never got anyone anywhere." I was going to call them and say..."why the heck would you put something like that up! Here you are, insulting people who are dealing with a truly difficult mental illness...like they could just wish it away!!!!" I was pleased to see that it wasn't there the next time I drove by. People can be such sheep!!!!!!
grrrrr, ha ha, love ya, linda -
Flower
Hi there!
Long time since you've been on here that I can see. I was dusting in my bedroom this morning and saw the jewelry box you gave me years ago. it looks qiite nice with the other things I have assembled there, a fan, two of my small artworks, a little glass cat. I always enjoy having objects around that remind me of friends.
We are still waiting on the house sale!!! and I am about to give up. We are thinking of maybe renting for a bit, in the same area. Who knows, Had chemo yesterday and will go again on October 20. That should be the last treatment here in PDX. well, time to head out to the library. It's never good when I am out of reading material! many hugs, linda -
Hug
Hey girlfriend,
Wondering where you've been? Hope you will write back and let me know what's happening.
lots of hugs, linda -
Hug
Give yourself tons of credit for being such a good friend! you rock! hugs, linda
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Hug
Hi, Thanks for the support and caring. I don't take you for granted, you are a special person. Yes, Florida is surely closer to ya'll. I have one niece left in New Jersey and one cousin. Otherwise, the family flew the coop. I'm not sure about the total body scan... will look into it. Wish it was like Star Trek, remember how they had this little box they'd move up and down you. Wouldn't just find things but would fix them! ha ha. The Eugene kids are coming up this weekend! Mazie called me last night. She was very excited. (At school they are doing a play, in which she's the narrator.) She knows everyone's lines, by heart, so I am thinking if they need a fill-in, she's their girl! Her memory is something else...a lot like Andy's was. He still recalls the phone number from the little house in Beaverton!!! Mac is going to Berkeley May 3rd to see/hear Van Morrison. I am not that big of fan (now if it was Prince or Queen Latifa!) so he's doing it solo. His trip to Florida is May 21, I think. I can't wait to have a pool. well, time to finish my kitchen clean-up. Think I am doing chicken and dumplings for dinner. Comfort food. hugs and love, linda
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Photos
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Support Groups
Close Depression
Type: Clinical (Major) DepressionLong story - have had major depression as symptom of other disorders but this is one of the hardest to overcome.
Treatments
- Celexa Not Working
- Didn't help me.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Working / Worked
- Had classes in hospitals, day treatment, and individually thru therapist/psychologist.
- Effexor Working / Worked
- Have been on this for quite a while - most of my meds Dr. does not want to change the combo much.
- Lexapro Working / Worked
- On this now as well - seems to help at dosage I have been on for over 2 years now.
- Positive Thinking Somewhat Helpful
- Hard to do. Seems to bring on overactivity to the opposite extremem like bipolar.
- Prozac Not Working
- Did NOT work - felt like legal "speed" (drug) to me!
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- Doesn't always help but it forces me to leave the house and it's taking some of the need to talk about situations with other than a relative or friend. They have burned out long ago.
- Seroquel Not Working
- Too sedating but was necessary when first in therapy and in hospital. Hard to think with it!
- Trazodone Not Working
- Too sedating but was necessary when first in therapy and in hospital. Hard to think with it!
- Wellbutrin Not Working
- Never did much of anything - they hoped it would help and not affect my appetit
- Writing Somewhat Helpful
- Problem was being able to stop or not go so deep into problems that I ended up reliving history! No need to go back there and trying to focus on today more and the future is the goal.
- Invega Working / Worked
- Has helped a great deal with paranoia espcially in the stores. Still hard to leave house though. Low dose of 3 mg and new to me still. Higher dose 6 mg knocked me out and I was dizzy!
Close Family & Friends of Cancer Patients
I am not sure how to be supportive of the people I know with cancer - very good friend with ovarian cancer, nephew with brain cancer now in hospice, brother's girlfriend recently diagnosed with uterine cancer and then just got note from husband's friend of 60 years that he has inoperable stomach cancer and has spread to his esophagus - he's at home with hospice care coming in. I lost my father when his colon cancer returned and a brother-in-law that had a life filled with cancer.
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Friends
