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sallymarie 
I'm sorry it took me an extra day to post but my doctor didn't call me back until 5:30. It was negative and I cried all day after that. That news hurt me worse than anything I've ever went through. It seems like I just can't overcome infertility. Every time I'm positive about something it always turns out negative. After I left the doctors office yesterday my husband and I went to the Babys R Us store and when I walked in I just thought to myself "I'm gonna get to shop in here after today" we went through and picked out all the stuff that we liked and just imagined where we would put this and that. It really hurts. The RE told me my number was under 2. She also said that I could have surgery (they will cut my stomach all the way across and take out one of my ovaries and my left tube and wait six weeks and then try another FET or just go ahead and start another FET. Those were my best Embies that she put in this time. I'm afraid that if I wait too long the endometriomas on my ovaries are going to get bigger and they'll have to take both of my ovaries. She wanted me to call her back today and kind of tell her what we wanted to do, but I just don't know. What hurts is my husband's ex is still working at the same plant my husband and I work at and she just found out that she was having a girl. She took off last week to Jamaca last week for their honeymoon so it was nice. But I just can't go back to work with this news and listen to her brag, I just can't do it. I can't even stand to watch commercials with kids in them or even be around kids. It hurts to bad. What do I do. Why can't I be happy for once. Why is it so hard. I just want a baby that come from a part of me and a part of my husband. All I get is bad news when it comes to trying to get pregnant. I'm so sorry to be so down but I am REALLY hurting right now. For those of you that are still in your 2ww, don't give up just keep those positive thoughts and I pray that you all have the BFP unlike me. I love you all and I couldn't make it through this if I didn't have you all and your positive thoughts and prayers. That's what got me this far. I hope everyone is doing great and everyone that is on their way with pregnancy, I pray that you have beautiful healthy babies, you really deserve it. I'm sorry I just can't bear to write anymore.
Comments
Im so sorry sweetie!!! I will pray for you and I know it will happen for you one day!!!!
amrouse28
I am so sorry! Please except my condolences on your loss. And please know I will pray for you and I believe that you will get to shop at Babies R Us, one day soon.
Peace and Blessings to you!
njmom2b
I hate that for you, and I know how bad it hurts. Take your time and heal and do what is best for you and DH.
LDosch
I am so sorry. That is the hardest thing in life. We struggle with a disease that kills us emotionally. I say go on with the surgery. Thats what I did and finally got my BFP. Good luck and keep us updated. I will keep you in my prayers.
sadgirl1979
I'm so sorry--good luck with your decision--your in my thoughts.
minik
I am so sorry :-( IF is such a hard, heart wrenching thing we have to deal with.
Will you get a second opinion before removing your ovary and tube? They wanted to do a hysterectomy on me when I was 19. I said no and am glad I did. I would of lost all chances of having a child. It is a bid decision. I will be praying for you!
Lioness816
I am so sorry. You and I have very similar medical histories. My endometrioma made my left ovary unusable and the rest of my reproductive system is eaten up with endometriosis and adhesions. I remember the feeling after getting my hopes up from the first IVF, just to come crahing right back to earth. I didn't want to try anymore. We had embies left so we thought we'd just give it a shot to say we tried and then I would go ahead and have and ovariohysterectomy. Funny thing is, when I had given up all hope, is when it worked. Don't give up yet. It worked for me eventually. It will work for you too.
suzyhopes
I amso very sorry that this cycle didn't work. I also had two perfect embies transferred this time and ended up with a BFN. Keep your chin up and know that we are all rooting for you. The way you are feeling right now is natural and normal. I have spent many years avoiding baby sections in stores, baby showers, 1st birthday parties and preggo friends. I know your pain all too well. I am praying that this next cycle brings you your miracle baby. I just know you are meant to be a mommy.
Jenelle8