Join Now
sallymarie 
I have had the worst AF ever. I can't hardly move at all. I called my doctor last week and I told her we wanted to do another FET. Well yesterday I was hurting so bad. I called and asked my sister what to do and she told me to have the surgery. She said my body needed to rest from all the medicine I had been taking for two and a half years. That made sense so DH and I talked about it and I said well you know... I'll probably be in surgery for an hour and maybe stay overnight, no big deal........well.....my RE called me back today and told me that we would plan to do my surgery next Wednesday. Then....... she said that the surgery would probably take about 3 to 4 hours and I would probably have to stay in the hospital until Saturday. That has me so freaked out. She said she would make a 6 inch incission across my belly and she would have to have another surgeon present because the endo is wrapped around my bowels. She said I wouldn't be pain free and she would try to save my ovaries but she don't know until she gets in there. I am so afraid. I think my husband is getting stressed out over all this surgery and infertility stuff. My life seems to be falling apart. I just don't know what to do. I feel like everyone has turned away. I know I've done bad things in my life but to suffer through all of this?
Comments
I'm sorry it took me an extra day to post but my doctor didn't call me back until 5:30. It was negative and I cried all day after that. That news hurt me worse than anything I've ever went through. It seems like I just can't overcome infertility. Every time I'm positive about something it always turns out negative. After I left the doctors office yesterday my husband and I went to the Babys R Us store and when I walked in I just thought to myself "I'm gonna get to shop in here after today" we went through and picked out all the stuff that we liked and just imagined where we would put this and that. It really hurts. The RE told me my number was under 2. She also said that I could have surgery (they will cut my stomach all the way across and take out one of my ovaries and my left tube and wait six weeks and then try another FET or just go ahead and start another FET. Those were my best Embies that she put in this time. I'm afraid that if I wait too long the endometriomas on my ovaries are going to get bigger and they'll have to take both of my ovaries. She wanted me to call her back today and kind of tell her what we wanted to do, but I just don't know. What hurts is my husband's ex is still working at the same plant my husband and I work at and she just found out that she was having a girl. She took off last week to Jamaca last week for their honeymoon so it was nice. But I just can't go back to work with this news and listen to her brag, I just can't do it. I can't even stand to watch commercials with kids in them or even be around kids. It hurts to bad. What do I do. Why can't I be happy for once. Why is it so hard. I just want a baby that come from a part of me and a part of my husband. All I get is bad news when it comes to trying to get pregnant. I'm so sorry to be so down but I am REALLY hurting right now. For those of you that are still in your 2ww, don't give up just keep those positive thoughts and I pray that you all have the BFP unlike me. I love you all and I couldn't make it through this if I didn't have you all and your positive thoughts and prayers. That's what got me this far. I hope everyone is doing great and everyone that is on their way with pregnancy, I pray that you have beautiful healthy babies, you really deserve it. I'm sorry I just can't bear to write anymore.
Comments
-
Im so sorry sweetie!!! I will pray for you and I know it will happen for you one day!!!!
-
I am so sorry! Please except my condolences on your loss. And please know I will pray for you and I believe that you will get to shop at Babies R Us, one day soon.
Peace and Blessings to you!
-
I hate that for you, and I know how bad it hurts. Take your time and heal and do what is best for you and DH.
-
I am so sorry. That is the hardest thing in life. We struggle with a disease that kills us emotionally. I say go on with the surgery. Thats what I did and finally got my BFP. Good luck and keep us updated. I will keep you in my prayers.
-
I'm so sorry--good luck with your decision--your in my thoughts.
-
I am so sorry :-( IF is such a hard, heart wrenching thing we have to deal with.
Will you get a second opinion before removing your ovary and tube? They wanted to do a hysterectomy on me when I was 19. I said no and am glad I did. I would of lost all chances of having a child. It is a bid decision. I will be praying for you!
-
I am so sorry. You and I have very similar medical histories. My endometrioma made my left ovary unusable and the rest of my reproductive system is eaten up with endometriosis and adhesions. I remember the feeling after getting my hopes up from the first IVF, just to come crahing right back to earth. I didn't want to try anymore. We had embies left so we thought we'd just give it a shot to say we tried and then I would go ahead and have and ovariohysterectomy. Funny thing is, when I had given up all hope, is when it worked. Don't give up yet. It worked for me eventually. It will work for you too.
-
I amso very sorry that this cycle didn't work. I also had two perfect embies transferred this time and ended up with a BFN. Keep your chin up and know that we are all rooting for you. The way you are feeling right now is natural and normal. I have spent many years avoiding baby sections in stores, baby showers, 1st birthday parties and preggo friends. I know your pain all too well. I am praying that this next cycle brings you your miracle baby. I just know you are meant to be a mommy.
Well tomorrow is the big day!!! I go in at 8:00 in the morning for my pregnancy test. I am already so nervous. I haven't felt anything today but a little nausea this morning. Yesterday I felt a lot of different things. Today I've been cramping a little. I still haven't took any pee tests so I'm very proud of myself. Yesterday I was really anxious to know but I didn't give in. I have been talking to my baby(s) in my stomach ever since I had my ET. I have a ring that I've been wearing too that has two little hearts on it and I haven't took it off in two weeks!! I've really had positive thoughts about this, I'm usually a very doubtful person but my preacher said that you have to believe that God will do it or what would be the point. Well I'm off for today, I probably won't sleep a wink tonight!!! I hope everyone is still doing great you are all in my prayers!!!!
Comments
-
Good luck!!!
-
You will be in my thoughts and prayers!! I will keep my fingers and toes crossed for you!
-
Praying for you!
-
Good luck! I am praying for you!! It is funny how we all have our own little rituals. Remind me to tell you sometime about mine for this cycle. I think I am a bit kuki! ;-)
-
Good luck. Keep us posted.
-
I'll be thinking of you! Best of Luck! Keep us posted!!
-
GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
I can't wait to hear the results!
Past Entries
| March 2008 |
Friday, 3/14
|
|
Wednesday, 3/12
|
Monday, 3/10
|
|
Saturday, 3/08
|
|
Friday, 3/07
|
|
January 2008 |
|
Wednesday, 1/30
|
|
July 2007 |
|
Tuesday, 7/31
|
Saturday, 7/28
|
|
May 2007 |
|
Monday, 5/28
|
|
Monday, 5/21
|
|
Thursday, 5/17
|
|
Wednesday, 5/09
|
|
Thursday, 5/03
|
|
Wednesday, 5/02
|
|
April 2007 |
|
Monday, 4/30
|
|
Sunday, 4/22
|
|
Tuesday, 4/10
|
|
Monday, 4/09
|
|
Wednesday, 4/04
|
|
March 2007 |
|
Thursday, 3/22
|
|
Sunday, 3/18
|
|
Sunday, 3/18
|
|
Wednesday, 3/07
|
|
Tuesday, 3/06
|
|
Saturday, 3/03
|
|
Friday, 3/02
|
You are going through something awful! AF is bad enough and for you to have it even worse is just salt in the wound. I'm so sorry this is going this way for you. Infertility affects EVERYTHING in your life including the relationship with your best friend, your husband. I am so glad your RE is doing the surgery and not an OB/GYN so she really knows how important having a baby is to you. Take care and good luck!
CarrieAnn
I hope you get some answers and help. Please ensure there is a gastroenterologist performing the bowel surgery with the gyn, as they are not trained always to do bowels surgery and could result in colostomy bags etc. I have endo bowel and they refused to perform surgery due to risk of perforating the bowel.
Sending you lots of support - I know how you feel!
utah31
I am sorry you are dealing with so much. I would think what you are going through is painful for you everyday. Look at it this way. In about 2 weeks you will be pain free or close to it for probably the first time in a long time. The good news is even though you will have pain you will also have pain meds to help you deal with it. It sounds like something you will have to do at some point no matter what. I wish you the best and am sorry it is so hard. Life is really rotten sometimes.
frustrated007
It will all turn out ok. My Re was able to save my ovary when they did they surgery. I don't think mine is quite as severe as yours, no bowel involvment. You are doing the right thing for your body. Like my RE told me somehow, and he's not quite sure how, but the theory is that endo causes embryos to not be able to adhere to the lining in your uterus. So reducing it even alittle will up your chances of getting pregnant.
suzyhopes
I'm so sorry you're going through so much--I hope everything turns out well. Good luck to you.
I really think you're doing what needs to be done.
minik
I am so sorry. You are not to blame for any of this. I too had mine wrapped around my bowels. You will get through this and you will move on. I am really worried about them just removing your ovaries with out a second opinion. You may want to stipulate that if they feel they need to remove them, not to b/c you want a second opinion. They wanted to remove all my stuff at 19 years old. I am glad I said no or there would never be a chance. Think about it, okay?
Lioness816
Oh, honey, you did nothing to deserve this - please try not to think that. God is with you, let him carry you through this - he is really good at it! You are in my prayers.
AnneMarie