kphelps's Journal

Ok, I am gonna try this again. I journaled yesterday , fell asleep, and deleted everything! So, I’ll try this again . The visit was wonderful with the exception of Sunday when I got sick and my mothers peculiarities making everyone feel unwelcome. Thursday morning at 9AM my Dad & I picked John (Tatt) up from the airport. He had flown all night and I was sure he was exhausted but John has so much energy one would never know! My dad loved John! He said(what we all knew) that he is just the sort of person you can’t help but like. As soon as I saw him I recognized him but even though I had told everyone about the weight gain and fluid gain and despite my carrying the cane I don’t think he knew who I was at first. He is exactly what he looks like but one thing I had not expected was HE IS SO TALL! Nevertheless, it was as though we had known one another for years. You know when you meet someone for the first time and it is sort of awkward? I swear to you I was as comfortable with everyone that came as I am with my own family (more so than some…LOL). So, we went back to my house, and Brenton called. He had planned on taking 6 days off work to spend with all of us. He was stuck and needed someone to come pick him up. I knew John had to be tired but he went with me anyway. This was the first chance I had ever had to be around someone with some of the same problems as myself…i.e.…same pain, meds, etc. It was nice to not feel so alone. When Brenton met John they hit it off right away. Brenton thinks he is the coolest thing since I don’t know what. Can you blame him?

The rest of the day we spent talking, and resting up for the crew coming on Friday! Also, Amanda came by with her mother (who I had never met). Timing on that one could have been a little better but I wasn’t about to say no to what May be my sons future mother-in-law. Mid-Day Friday, Joni & Brittany arrived. They called and we went to meet them. They had checked in their room when we got there and we realized we didn’t know their last name..LOL So, John called Joni and she came to the lobby. We hugged and I started to cry. LOL You know us women. She brought me the most beautiful hanging basket of flowers. I hope I can keep them alive because a green thumb I do not have!

I cannot tell you how impressed I am with Brittany (Joni’s daughter). She was born HCV +. She is beautiful! I mean a doll…just ask my son who consistently reminded himself “I am engaged…I am engaged” LOL You know how people can be pretty on the inside which makes them beautiful outside? She is both! She smiles constantly! She is 16 but she doesn’t have the typical 16 yr. old attitude that detracts from so many teen girls beauty. She treats her Mom like her best friend and she has the best attitude about this disease I have ever seen. Brenton said he would give anything to have her attitude. Those 2 got along great!

Next Shelli & Geary arrived. These two are the perfect example of a happily married couple! Geary was on treatment during the trip! Let me say that again and let it sink in…GEARY WAS ON TREATMENT THE ENTIRE TRIP! You would never had known it. He didn’t look or act sick. Shell is a great support system for him. If everyones spouse were as supportive as her the world would be a better place. She said how kind everyone here at DS has been to her even though she doesn’t have HCV. Really though the families are effected as much as we are. Friday was Tattoo night for Bubby! We all watched as Brenton got his tattoo. I cannot believe what an artist John is. It looks awesome! We also got to talk to MUMof Three from Australia that night. What a funny gal! Her accent is straight from “down under”. I asked her to send me a koala bear..LOL Still waiting. Oh, and Thursday I got to talk to our very own McKenzie with her beautiful French Canadian accent. She is such a sweetheart.

Saturday morning Joan49 made it from New Jersey. I was getting run down so I decided to stay home and rest while John went to meet her. Everyone made plans to go to the mall and shop. I knew from Xmas that I couldn’t do the mall because they don’t have wheelchairs so I told them to call me when they decided where to meet for dinner. Later on that evening they called and told me they would meet me at the Texas Roadhouse. We waited almost 3 hours for a seat. It was prom night. I didn’t mind because we all got to take pictures, etc. When we finally got seated I remembered Johns B-Day was that week so I waited till his wife called and talked to the others about ordering a piece of cake and have the waiters come sing Happy B-Day to him. When they arrived he was gone to the bathroom so we had to send them back…LOL Timing…great! They returned a little later and it was the first time I ever saw Tatt blush! LOL When dinner was finished everyone decided to return to the room and I took Brent and went home. Joan hadn’t had any sleep after driving from New Jersey so I knew she was exhausted. However, I had no idea that my own body was preparing for total lockdown!

Sunday was the day Joni/Brittany 7 Shell/Geary were leaving so I really wanted to get up early and go to the hotel to have breakfast with them before they left. I woke up and knew it was not going to be a very good day! There was blood on the sheets and pillowcases where varices had broke and I had bled from my mouth during the night. I went to get up and pain stopped me cold. I knew it was going to be a “walker “ day verses a cane day..LOL I kept thinking ..”If I just sleep a little longer I will feel like going”. Next thing I knew Brenton was waking me up telling me everyone except John & Joan had left. I was so sad. I didn’t want anyone to see me like that either. If things had been different I would have had everyone over at my house but it is not my house and my Mom was acting so awful. I tried several times to force myself to get up but no luck. Finally, I was hurling in the waste basket, crying in pain when Brenton said, “Uh, Mom I have to get back to Ohio. “Great! I told him to go ask his grandpa who had been bit by the flu bug. Nope…too sick. Grandma? Nope to crazy..LOL. So, John & Joan agreed to take him. Wonderful, I thought. Not only can I not be hospitable enough to even go see them but now I have to ask them to take my son home in a place they know nothing about. I felt like the hostess from hell. Of course, when they arrived I was at the peak of sick…I just wanted to die. Being the good friends they are they came in …John helped hold my hair while I hurled…Joan sit beside me and consoled me. Finally the pain let up. I hugged them goodbye and they left to take Brenton home. I felt so bad because this was not how I wanted the trip to end for them. I hope they know if I could have helped it I would have.

Despite how it ended this has meant more to me then anyone could ever know. I will cherish this as long as I live and take the memories with me when I go! I wish I could have met those of you that wanted to come and couldn’t. I understand believe me. I love you no less. This support group has created a medium for those with all sorts of problems to develop lifetime friendships. It has allowed us to know we are not alone. I thank God for everyone here that I call friend. Without you I don’t think I would have been able to carry on like I have. I have been told by several that I am an inspiration. Funny, I don’t feel like an inspiration…I feel inspired. Inspired by those of you that I have met here on DS. Love You & God Bless! Kristina