meganK08's Journal

I am back in the hospital hopefully going home tomorrow. but i cannot sleep tonight at all its not the pain it is just that the pump for the IV makes that noise and it isnt helping that the nurses wake you up for meds. My CT scan came out ok pelvic fluid again of course i dont know. Im really tired but i cant seem to go to bed. so counseling today was pretty good we talked alot about hubby and how maybe me no longer telling him i hurt or how my appts or meds are will be ok. i did tell him tonight though that when i go home they are upping my lyrica and i will be super tired again. i hope he understands he said ok and kept reading his book. i really wish he could hav been here when my dr or the counselor was here they would have set him straight. we need to talk but i dont know how so my homework for counseling is to write him a letter of how i feel. She also said i need to stop telling my family what is going on which is hard since my baby sister calls everyday and i have a hard time not talking to them. I watched my mom waste away in front of me and she kept telling them she was fine so they all blame my dad for what happened. It was the disease not his fault. its crazy but for now im going to try to take care of me i need to try to figure out why i got PID again i hate this i didnt do anything to get it. Im also going to focus on my depression i know alot of it comes from being sick and hurting all the time but im trying so hard to get out of the house and work on school. need to stay out of this place that would be good too. But im not going to focus on that tonight i cannot wait to get home and see my dog i miss him.