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UPDATED GOALS
find a better doctor
Progress 85%
Encouragements: 1
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be myself again
Progress 20%
Encouragements: 0
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sleep the entire night
Progress 5%
Encouragements: 0
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Some nights i lay here and think that I wish that my life were different. That i could go to school and not have people look at me like im nuts because im carrying a pillow to all of my classes. Or that im the only one in a giant hoodie or sweaters because i get so cold when it is 80 or 90 degrees outside. i feel so alone some days. I have wonderful and beautiful friends at DS and someday I hope that we can meet and have so much fun at the beach in the nice warm sun drinking fun little drinks. hehe Right now though I have my cycle and my teachers are still not understanding. to top it all off i am so bloated and swollen that i look like im preggo. I know it is the meds but i am so scared. I have gained 10 pounds in a month ive never ok i know im not huge im up to 95 pounds but i have never weighed this much and with the bloating it actually hurts like on top of my other pain i have pain because im giganormous. i dont want hubby to see me this way. Last time he said damn honey what happened to your face. then thursday he said you really did break out. I just hate myself right now. im trying with school but either i cannot remember what goes on or like how i have my period i cant even get to school. Then im trying to think it is stress but im still throwing up and thank god for the steriods so im not losing weight. hubby even looked at me the other day and told me i need to start going to the gym. he did call and ask me tonight how i was feeling and he did yesterday too. Ever since i told him i cannot talk to him about this anymore he has tried to be helpful. I just tonight feel alone i want hugs i want someone here. I think that i am going to have to drop two classes simply because the one at 9 in the morning most nihgts lately i either cannot go to sleep or im waking up every couple hours hurting so bad. or i just simply wake up. Then just being there at the school for so long my hips
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So I failed an open book quiz because i forgot what I had read and during the quiz i totally freaked out. I didnt realize there was a back until too late and my mind was so foggy. I got my period yet again so i have missed most of my classes this week. Some of my teachers are understanding and let me work at my own pace just as long as i get the work turned in. My math teacher though dosnt. He doesnt let me make up any work. But i am trying. I went to school on wednesday only to embarass myself by getting sick at school then hurting so bad. I have an appt to talk to the head of student relations next week hopefully some good can come out of it.
UPDATED GOALS
Have a great semester
Progress 0%
Encouragements: 0
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Goal Updated
I'm sorry you are having a rough go of things right now hon. One thing you mentioned here in your journal really caught my eye....you said you have gained 10 lbs and you are up to 95 lbs.....if it isn't too personal may I ask how tall you are?
I am wishing all the best for you. {{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}
Kaino