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theesadster 
12:20pm, August 27, 2009
Completely lost,
in a cloud of guilt
and grief,
walking among the living
but living among the dead.
Completely lost in sadness
and engulfed by despair,
at the end of my rope,
too much weight to bear,
does life even care?
in a cloud of guilt
and grief,
walking among the living
but living among the dead.
Completely lost in sadness
and engulfed by despair,
at the end of my rope,
too much weight to bear,
does life even care?
Comments
Albert....I know this will probably sound cliche' but I have been where you are (I am posting in regards to both your recent entries).
I hid my depression and sadness for many years. I had it down to a "T" NOONE knew, not even my partner of 14 years. I *had* to hold it together for the sake of any and everyone involved....or so I thought...
Had I just went ahead and let go, let myself less than *strong*, had I went and let people know what was going on, I would not have crashed in august of 2007 and then crashed and burned at the end of Nov 2007....I tried to take my own life Albert, I wanted to escape and disappear. It was not rational thought, it was all the depression and sadness that had overwhelmed me and built up within me for so very long. I had no one I felt I could turn to so it just escalated until I OD'd.
I wish I had known about this site (well, this part of the site) back when I was crashing in august. I know the wonderful people who DO understand could have been a world of help for me and may have saved me from myself. Albert, WE are here for you....You are important to many, we are not just here to joke and laugh with, we are here to hold your and Izzie's hands when the rough times come along. Reach out to us, we are here for you.
Peace & Love~
Rima
faraway
I feel you overwhelming sadness in those few words. My sons walk in the world still yet for them they still walk in the hell. They are ostracised because they were born with fragile x syndrome. They look and act differently, the terrible thing is that they know it. They will never know the priviledge of having their own children, not even for a short while. Their hell never ends either. I am a humanist, it helps me see past my own and their pain and makes me want to reach out to help other people to make the best of their own lives in honour of our loved ones who cannot. Live for your son, he is yours always. No one can remove them from us, they are always part of us. I would like to share your happy memories of him, if that would help to celebrate his life. (Jane)
bookeater
Your words are heart breaking. It's okay and natural to be sad, to be ANGRY, to have whatever emotions or feelings you're having.
Eskimo Proverb:
“Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.”
I have no doubt that Junior is looking down on you, Izzie, and his brother and sisters and wants you to be happy. Hugs.
LynnsLittleSis
i can relate.. hope you feel better soon
stefaniamia
Hi I don't know if life cares or not, But I do ! Please Hang In There My FRIEND. I'm here if you need to talk, Okay?
HUGSssssssssssssssssssss, KAT
recycling