Hi my name is Tish and I am a 36 …
Hi my name is Tish and I am a 36 year old married to my high school sweetheart and have two beautiful little girls. I …
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sb57 
6:17pm, September 10, 2009
As some of you might know, I love and brag about my children. Well, I have been anticipating my daughter's graduation from UNC-Chapel Hill. Yesterday, the day before we were supposed to leave to attend her graduation celebration, I received an email from her. She explained how she was not going to graduate and for the last 4 years she has been living a lie. In 2005, she lost her academic eligiblity. She has tried to take some classes, but has dropped them. I know she has credit from her 1st semester and she showed us another class where she made a B. Other than that she has no credit. She has gotten married in the meantime to a wonderful, smart young man who is in graduate school. He is working on his Phd. She has hid all of this from him as well.
Megan, was salutitorian in her high school class. She was very motivated and it was an honor to be accepted to UNC chapel hill especially as an out of state student. She did have the hard first year, but we got her some psychological help and I thought she was on the right track. We let her handle her money for the most part. When she decided to get married we gave her the remaining money we had saved for her college. We told her to pay for the wedding and save enough to finish school. I guess all of that money is gone. She was soooo convincing. I can't believe this has happened. It just seems so bizarre--like something you see in a TV show.
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What has she been doing? How has she fooled her husband too & why? I just can't imagine what she did all day & why she felt the need to lie. She must have been afraid to disappoint any one. I'm sorry she felt she had to do that.
ca0711
Shelly, I am so sorry...It does sound like something you would see on TV. I am going to make a suggestion - take it or throw it out. Ask her is she is willing to go to counseling again. If she is, don't give her the money, have the therapist send you the bill. She obviously has some severe self-esteem issues as well as something else is going on. I agree with Royce, she was terribly afraid of disappointing you and her husband. They are going to need help too, as a huge trust issue has emerged. I have been through a similar situation with my oldest son. We paid for 3 different colleges and he has NO credits to his name. Lies in order not to disappoint. Now at 26 he's going back again, but I will not pay this time. Hopefully with the money coming out of his own pocket he will do the right thing, if not, he has to take responsiblity for himself. Please don't be so hard on yourself, it's her responsibilty not yours. It's okay to be disappointed in her lies, but you did nothing wrong. We love our children and want to believe in the best of them. My prayers are with you and your husband, and of course your daughter.
hugs,
Dee
Slowmoving