Tamara999

Open Chronic Fatigue Syndrome

Was diagnosed with Epstein Barr (CFS) in 1989 just as I was turning 30 and ended up losing my whole life. DId not realize how much of my life I have lost. Was in denial. Thought I slept away my 30's and these past 8 years of my 40's because I was depressed. Even my therapist tried her best to GET ME OUT OF BED. But I had a feeling it wasn't psychological. I have not had much of a life -- working jobs I hate as an Executive Assistant --just for the benefits. sleeping when not at work.

Treatments

Klonopin Not Working

These types of drugs don't work on me. Where's the fun in that?

Sleep Working / Worked

Go to bed right after work. Cry when the alarm goes off in the morning. Stay in bed until the last possible minute. Go to bed Friday night and sometimes sleep all the way until Sunday midmorning. I dont even wake up! Just go straight through. Its a lonely wasted life.

Open Bipolar Disorder

I have fought this diagnosis over and over and over. Finally have said,"Maybe" to the latest "spectrum" addition. However when all had build up and had emotional breakdown over weekend (3/15 & 16) and could not get self checked into hospital because my COBRA messed up on my benefits and showed me canceled and I broke almost every piece of glass I own in my kitchen, I decided to give my bipolar diagnosis a closer look. I embrace the power of my mania.

Treatments

Abilify Not Working

Freaked me out. My world turned psychodelic in a baaad way.

Depakote Not Working

DId not work and made me fat which made things worse. AND The fat did NOT melt off once I stopped the med. FAT FAT FAT UGLY UGLY UGLY. Wanna make someone who is depressed even more depressed?? Make 'em fat.

Lamictal Considering

Lithium Not Working

Another med that did not work and blew me up like a balloon after the doctor told me NO MORE FAT MEDS. Here I sit -- 30 pounds overweight and can't get it off. I curse the day the doctor was born.

Risperdal Working / Worked

LOVED!! But doc had me on 5mgs which had me like a zombie. OVER MEDICATED. Had to go off as there was too much prolactin in my blood and my nipples were leaking milk and I developed a pituitary brain tumor.

Topamax Working / Worked

Makes me stupid. Freaks me out and I go off in a panic. One PLUS: Takes off the weight Depakote put on.

Wellbutrin Working / Worked

Though it speeds me up and I can't sleep at night.

Open Menopause

Menstral cycle stopped in August 2005 which actually was due to a pituitary brain tumor (benign) not discovered until 8/2007. Once dissolved via medication in late 3/2008, I was thrown into menopausal hell -- one long constant hot flash of non-stop (seriously, it never stops!) burning, painfully sensitive to the touch skin, face on fire, trapped in mental and self-hatred anguish. Today (4/22/08) just days before 49th birthday, blood test finally confirmed, I am crone,

Treatments

Black Cohosh Working / Worked

lessened my painful freezing spells swinging into my over the top deep burning hot flashes. Now my hot flash is just a constant all the time hot and sweating, burning skin state. Which IS an improvement, believe it or not.

Prempro Working / Worked

Don't know. Doctor prescribed today (4/22/08). Pharmacy has to special order.

Open Mononucleosis

First had mono in Fall 1980. I guess it's reoccurring?? Came back as EBV in Feb 1989. I keep getting sick every couple of years. I am so confused. I have CFS and FMS. Doctor has suggested I go on permanent disability as have not been able to hold down a job for longer than a couple of years without getting sick. This is really messing with my self esteem. When I do work I come home and go right to bed and then I also sleep my weekends away. Since 1989 I lost my life.

Open Brain / CNS Tumors

In August 2005, I stopped my menstral cycle. I thought it was menopause -- and an easy one at that! In 2007, I had a few instances of light breast leakage. I found out this was due to high levels of prolactin in my blood WHICH can be due to a pituitary tumor. In August 2007 an MRI did confirm a brain tumor in my pituitary (benign I am told). My endochronologist prescribed a medication for me to take orally to deal with this (instead of surgery). Yea.

Open Eating Disorders

I am obsessed with my body. I was lucky to get my weight to good place in 2005 and then my meds doc put me on something that kicked me in the head and made me gain 30 pounds in three weeks last year and I can't get it off and am obsessed!!! no matter what I do. I am thinking of taking non-stop laxatives and doing juice fast until I can drop the weight. I don't care!! The healthy way has not been working. I HATE MYSELF.

Treatments

Overeaters Anonymous (OA) Working / Worked

Started going to meetings in August 2005. Got a wonderful sponsor right away. Became abstinent 10/10/05. Dropped 30 pounds. WAS IN HEAVEN. Then ..... last year all went to hell ... got laid off in July. Lost abstinence .. lost sponsor. Meds doc put me on lithium which caused me to gain THIRTY pounds in three weeks!! Went off lithium and the weight has stuck. No matter what I do ... Got mono/Chronic Fatigue flare-up and too sick to attend meetings (and too embarrassed cuz TOOO FAT ...)

Psychotherapy Not Working

Therapy did not help.

Support from Friends & Family Not Working

They just tell me to keep doing what I am doing. WELL WHAT I AM DOING -- HEALTHY DIET AND EXERCISE -- IS NOT WORKING. ????

Topamax Not Working

It worked in 2005 in one month!! Now IT TORTURES ME BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN TAKING IT SINCE NOVEMBER AND IT WILL NOT WORK! I TOSS AND I TURN AT NIGHT BECAUSE NO MATTER WHAT I DO .. NO MATTER HOW MUCH I TAKE IT WILL NOT PERFORM THE SAME MAGIC. It really is driving me mad. WTF??? And I am so mad at my meds doc. I TOLD HIM -- no fat meds. And he put me on Lithium. And all it did was plump me up. AND I WAS FINE. I AM TORTURED.

Open Food Allergies
Type of allergy: Other Foods

Osteopath told me to stay off wheat and dairy for a while. Never got to ask him but figure it is due to us finding out if I am allergic or not (have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and he probably thinks it is just allergies. He always told me the CFS is just in my head. Nice).

Treatments

Avoid Certain Foods / Chemicals Too Soon to Tell

Avoid wheat and dairy. Saw doc on July 2nd ... have not started avoidance yet.