miahugsandprayers's Journal

I am now back in my new house now,and I should be so happy ,but I am lonly and feeling a bit down.I have been at my daughters most of the time since I moved with back problems and health in genaral.Had a horrible flare up,I know its becouse I did too much moving and over doing the worrying about everything.So tonight is the first night here for 2 weeks.The decorating is looking so nice and its a beautifull house and I am so blessed.So why do I feel like this?I have always wanted a garden that I can sit in and I have it,I have always wanted to live in the country and I have that too,the house is starting too look like I have always wanted my house to be like and you know what I am still not satisfied.My girls are telling me that I have made the best move and that I am sure to be down becouse I lived the same area for 30 years and now I am in a place I don,t know.My eldest daughter said it took her 2 years-Oh I hope its not that long for me.

I feel like I have lost a lot of my independence,everywhere I go I have to go with my daughter in the car as I don,t know where the buses are or where they go,so I am never alone to do anything I want.I have to wait on everyone before I can go out the door.I know that I should be so gratfull that I have children that care and want to help,but I want some of my old live back.Sorry everyone for all this moaning I should be so happy.And to top it all the doctor here has no clue what Fibro is,and refused to give me a perscription for my sleeping pills.They also relax my muscles,she has given me some that can onbly be taken for 2 weeks.Don,t make sence to me seeing as she said my old ones where to adcitive and these ones are worse.