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nina34 
12:17pm, July 4, 2009
how did this happen to me?
i still dont get how i ended up in a abusive marriage!
i grew up with a wonderful mom and dad who are still together.
VERY loving relationship i have heard them fight maybe once or twice IN MY LIFE.
they are still so cute and flirt and my dad even smacks my moms butt in front of everyone sometimes.. haha
hes always telling her shes to good for him and they are sooo cute!
i met my husband at a church dance, CHURCH dance,
he dosent smoke drink or anythign like that! me either.
i just dont get it!
how did i end up with someone abusive?
why did i let myself ?
why didnt i end it when he pushed me while we were dating (he thought i was flirting with another guy)
its not like i saw that all the time growing up. why did i allow it and act like it was nothing?
he cheated on me when we were dating AND he even threw things and punched walls why we were engaged. i even knew that he slapped his ex girl friend across the face!
whats wrong with me? did i think i was going to help him? i dont get it! i know he hasnt cheated on me since we have been married, i also know he wouldnt.. i really belive that. and i do think hes better, but i heard that it could just be a pattern. i dont know what to think?
Comments
Dear Nina,
Did you try and help hurt animals as a child? You might just be the nurturing type who believes that a person can change with the right help. Forget how this happened as hind site is always 20/20.
Instead think about how you can get out of this situation without incurring any more damage to yourself! Eric
weinere46
Eric has a point, I don't know that any of us have the answer for our particular situations either. I know I don't know in mine either.
You are truly a wonderful person inside and out. Focus on finding the right path to make yourself happy and safe for you and your son.
soulgone
I don't know if I have an answer either, Nina. I wish I had some profound advice for you. You just need to make yourself happy and keep you and your son out of harm's way. Thinking of you as always!
NCFroggy
The best way to answer those questions is by finding a counselor who "gets" you. My advice is to find one you like. The sooner you can answer those questions, the stronger and better able you will be to improve your situation. Good luck and hugs!!
thinmind
Dear Nina
I know the feeling "how could this be happening to me". But your human and you seem to me to have a good heart and as well the personality. Please.. Dont start putting the blame on yourself. Right know your going through what I call a reliazation/ flashback wondering and recapturing moments you ignored and putting together missing pieces. That sloves the answer dont ignore this anymore or think this is going away and that things will hopefully come back right when it was'nt. Try your best to deal with it. Do what's best for you and child. I hope no matter what the outcome is that you will be okay. Look in the mirror
at yourself and at who you are your all the things he says your not. Your worth more than any words.
ariesc8942