my borther who now ignores me
April 14, 2008 9:28pm
FUZZY CATERPILLARS CRAWLING ON MY TOES
CHANGE...
BEFORE MY EYES INTO KAEIDOSCOE COLORED BUTTERFLIES
OUR DREAMS SECURED BY A GENTLE BLOW
ON THE PUFFY …
stefaniamia
8:06am, September 26, 2009
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About Me
stefaniamia
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About Me
Im lost at the moment trying to find out who this person I see every morning is.. I'm a public school teacher and want to do more... I'm perfectly functional and put on great mask to cover up the battle I'm fighting daily, I'm a dreamer, I'm an "emotional hemophiliac", I'm eccentric, I'm looking for love, I have great empathy for all suffering, and I'm waiting for the day that I will feel real happiness...
Im lost at the moment trying to find out who this person I see every morning is.. I'm a public school teacher and want to do more... I'm perfectly functional and put on great mask to cover up the battle I'm fighting daily, I'm a dreamer, I'm an "emotional hemophiliac", I'm eccentric, I'm looking for love, I have great empathy for all suffering, and I'm waiting for the day that I will feel real happiness...
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Interests
I love salsa , running, the ocean, reading, animals, writing, talking to people, family, Italy, and one day I hope myself...
I love salsa , running, the ocean, reading, animals, writing, talking to people, family, Italy, and one
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Recent Activity
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Journal
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my experience with therapy....
April 13, 2008 11:22am
SHE WALKED IN AND IMMEDIATELY THE SURROUNDINGS BROUGHT BACK THE TIME THAT SHE MOST WANTED TO ERASE FROM HER MEMORY, THE GUILT RIDDEN HOWLS IN THE …
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??
April 11, 2008 10:18pm
EverytimeI see her
I think of the image
She used to see
The one that horrified her
The oen that made her question
every minute..
The one that made …
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I HATE TITLES
April 5, 2008 10:04pm
IM DESTITUTE PAYING 500 DOLLARS A WEEK FOR THERAPY, MY INSURANCE COMOANY WONT TOUCH ANY OF IT IT'S NTO BIOLOGICAL THEY SAY
HOW SMART OF THEM …
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Hugbook
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Ah, i c. (o;
Hey, your profile status...'did it again'...not sure what it means? but you ok, hun?-
Hug
Everytime I look at your profile picture I try to figure it out...still can't! lol
How are you? Drop me a line if you get a chance! Hugs to you! 
UR Welcome
Anytime you need to talk le me know.
Hug
What ever you are going through, here is a hug and i hope you feel better. You can always send me a message.
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Hey, so sorry I couldn't chat! Hit me up when you get back on if you see me! Hugs!!!
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Photos
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Goals
View all in progress Goals
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Support Groups
Close Depression
Type: Clinical (Major) DepressionActually I don't know what I have, I've been to six different psychologists since I started seeking help at 21, I've been told depression anxiety bipolar, borderline personality disorder, some psychosis, all give different diagnosis. I'v been suffering since 12,13 I'm 35 and can't seem to get the right help. I'm tired. i also have endometriosis, it seems God wasnt satisfied with punishing my mind, my body is always in pain.
Treatments
- Celexa Not Working
- worked for a little, stopped
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Not Working
- stupid, a joke, especially when doctors take insurance, side efects made me feel worse, doctors have told me they no longer want to see me, i guess they get frustrated when meds dont work, or they take themslelves off the ghi panel, one dr,. said"Maria, patients usually get better faster when they pay.."
- Cymbalta Not Working
- didnt work then ,not working now
- Effexor Not Working
- Electroconvulsive therapy Considering
- thinking of it
- Geodon Not Working
- Lexapro Not Working
- dont remember
- Paxil Not Working
- dont remember
- Positive Thinking Not Working
- impossible for me to do
- Psychotherapy Not Working
- I have found that most psychologist only care when you pay cash and not insurance, one, my first psychologist even said that those who pay her would have gotten better by now, that was 15 years ago.
- Seroquel Not Working
- knocked me out, given to me in the hospital, is this their idea of treatment
- Support from Friends & Family Somewhat Helpful
- some stick around , others get tired as family and friends have told me "Everyone has their limits." yeah well, so do i
- Wellbutrin Not Working
- didnt work then, not working now, why would dr's give the same meds over and over
- Writing Somewhat Helpful
- painful to write
- Zoloft Not Working
Close Endometriosis
diagnosed 10 years ago never took care of it, im in so much pain
Open Eating Disorders
Type: Anorexiadon't know if i have an eating disorder im 5 feet 4 and 120 lbs, i have no appetite, but im also on meds for depression which may cotribute, however i have always been overly concious of my weight . i run 8 miles a day . And that is very little for me, used to run 14 miles a day as well as gym for to 3 hours. The only things i put in my mouth and ths may sound strange is a couple of cookies and or pieces of chocolate, but my weight remains the same, so I don't know do I have an eating disorde
Treatments
- Celexa Not Working
- didnt do anything
- Dietitian Consult Not Working
- didnt follow
- Lexapro Not Working
- Paxil Not Working
- dont remember
- Psychotherapy Not Working
- therapy for depression
- Support from Friends & Family Not Working
- all my mother does is cook for me still at my agge and gets mad when i say imnoto hungry
- Topamax Not Working
- Zoloft Not Working
Open Personality Disorders
Type: Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)The last diagnosis I have recieved is borderline personality disorder, after researching it I find this to be the one that most fits my problems(Ihave had several diagnosis).
Treatments
- Talking Not Working
- talking to those who listen helps for the moment, but they are very rare to find.
- Hydrocodone Working / Worked
- it is not prescribed for mental health but when my emotions overhwelm me its the only thing i can do however it is addicitng
Open Healthy Relationships
I BECOME VERY DEPRESSED DURING RELATIONSHIPS, THE FIRST RELATIONSHIP I HAD I FELT I WAS TOO UGLY FOR THE GUY, THEN JUST LAID IN BED BASICALLY FOR 4 YEARS, HE LEFT ME. AFTER THAT, SEX STARTS RIGHT AWAY AND THEY ALWAYS LEAVE.
Treatments
Open Smoking Addiction & Recovery
want to quit, cant its a crutch and a friend....
Treatments
- Cold Turkey Not Working
- worked for abotu threed days
- Easyway To Stop Smoking Not Working
- never read the end
- Nicotine Patch Not Working
- smoked with it
Open Alcoholism
A loved one is an alcoholic, I would like to know how to help...
