Willgord's Journal

     Alcoholism was a lonely business, even though we were surrounded by people who loved us.......We were trying to find emotional security by dominating or by being dependent upon others......We still vainly tried to be secure by some unhealthy sort of domination or dependence.

AS BILL SEES IT, p.252

When I did my personal inventory I found that I had unhealthy relationships with most people in my life.....my friends and family, for example.  I always felt isolated and lonely.  I drank to dull emotional pain.

It was through staying sober, having a good sponsor and working the Twelve Steps that I was able to build up my low self-esteem.  First the Twelve Steps taught me to become my own best friend, and then, when I was able to love myself, I could reach out and love others.