wooty's Journal

Hi yall,

  wow .... where to start?

 last night, all of a sudden, i started tingling all over, coulndt talk right, shooting pains/shocks running through me.... couldnt walk right...

   we called my daughter, she rushed right over and took all my vitals, which were fine, bp and pulse were a bit high, but nothing huge, my eyes were clear, coulnt open them thogh, they were so heavy!!!   while she was here, i did seem to get some better, but later on felt the same way. i did get a good nights sleep last night tho... that helped i think. 

   So today i just feel weak, i got up early to work on my website, got some things made and ready to go, but now im getting tired again.

  im calling the neurologist today, im overdue for a checkup, and really am scared about the "spell" last night... as my mommy would have called it...lol

   The buisiness is growing so fast and furious.... which is fantastic!!! steve still isnt back to work, so hes helping with the house, cooking and so on... so i can work on my jewelry. i hope you will all go talk a lookyloo again, so much new stuff ive done!!!! so please go look, i love your comments and suggestions.

    we have deciced to move into the 2nd floor of the apt building where bun (the daughter) lives. her hubbies auntie lives on teh first floor, and bun and paris on the 3rd floor. I cant believe we are moving again.... but believe it or not...there were TWO drive-by shootings across the street this week. I heard them... then cops as far as the eye could see. im terrified a bullet will stray and come in our house, or steve will get hit when hes walking outside. we also just cant afford the rent here with steve out of work. the tennent hasnt paid a dime for a month, he just got back to work and swears he will catch up with his first paycheck, but ill believe it when i see it.

   i know you are all yelling at me....kick him out, but believe me, its easier said than done. it will be easier to move ourselves, then he HAS to go. .. and of course their is that chance he will actually pay us, we cant move till a couple of weeks at least, so im just biding my time with him.

   Steve is thinking of going into a rehab for a while. long story, but he is very ill, and needs help. we cant afford the tests and doc appointments, but if he goes into a mental hospital, he is severly depressed and he does have OCD ... or an alcohol program, (he isnt drinking like he used to, but thats only a beer or two away when he is this depressed), and if he goes in to an inpatient program, he will get his medical needs met. I feel like a welfare rat.... but we see no other way, and he is really not doing well.... and i cant take care of him.

  i will stay with bun and paris and slowly settle into the new apartment downstairs while steve is in rehab. We are praying that God leads and guides us.... im scared out of my britches about it all, but I feel that is the door that God has opened.

It will be so hard to be without steve, and i wont have much of a chance to go see him.... that will kill me, but again... God is the head.

   My last auntie died last sunday. its so sad that these days we all live so far away from each other. there isnt a chance i can go, and my cousins all say they undersstand, but i loved auntie may so..... and i wish i could be there for them all. her son mark emailed me a story that ill journal later. God works so mightily.... He is so good.

    well, off to read journals and huggles. love you all.