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wooty 
10:29am, January 16, 2009
well, i havent been here for a while, just popping in and out. Ive been so darn busy, trying to make a Christmas, of some sort, but i guess that isnt to be for us , is it?
One more day to go, we are planning on going to my daughters for Christmas eve and spending the night, etc, and here i am, dozens of cookies to make, not one present bought, the house looks like hiroshima, and i am down for the count.
steve hasnt had any work since november, so hes been taking care of the house, but we have 2 boarders now, the little ones have been over from time to time, and i am just overwhelmed right now.
i wish i could learn to take care of the simplest things, coming in here to give and get support, sitting and writing, but i cant get it through my head that i cant just push myself to go on. I always feel better after reading journals and commenting, sending huggles and such, but i let it go to try to move mountains. i guess for us, moving a moutain is reduced to nudging a molehill, huh?
im sure you are all in the same boat, im not telling you anything you dont know.
the cfs is coming in waves over me. i think ... well, i have been doing alot, but i havent really, and yet its wayyyyyyy too much for me. dam it, dam it, dam it.
I love the one tenent we have, reggie, hes a great guy and no trouble at all, but the new guy gives me the creeps. we needed the money so bad, we had to do it, but he freaks me out. hes real clingy and wants to be buddies with us,and i dont like that. we arent doing this for friendships. i dont want to know that "hes stepping out for a bit, " i really dont give a crap. he calls when hes out to ask if he should bring home "a piece of meat for dinner", um noooo, cook something for you if you want, but i dont wnat to have din-din together. i offered him sme of our diner last night, cause it ws the right thing to do, we didnt eat together, i just told him he could have some if he wanted, and i guess that gave him the green light to plan for intimate dinners with us. yuk.
i realize that i am a total bitch, but its tricky buisiness renting out rooms in your own home, and im just not comfy with him. IM praying he will want to leave, but he tells us today he loves it here. sheesh. be careful what you pray for, you just might get it......lol.
so enough of my rant, i will try to get up the strength to roll the little balls for the teacakes.... lol, it feels like im rolling boulders in sand.... im weak as a kitten today.
i hope you are all ok and doing better today. i love you all so.
Comments
no your arent a total bitch, you have to lay down some ground rules then, some people can take a hint, others have to have it written in large letters for them. If you let him become "buddies" there will be no respect for your home. He will take advantage ... he is trying to push to see how far you will let him go! I hope he will get the message.. stop being kind, stop offering food, or whatever. You just want a business arrangement.. you are brave doing this, theres no way I would have a lodger.
pilgrimVon
yes indeed i agree you have to lay some rules and be comfortable with them and be yourself dear..hugs karen in Delaware xoxoxo
karen77777
Wooty, my dear friend, I agree, don't feel badly about laying down some rules. Tell him you are in poor health, you need to keep it businesslike. Lay it on the line, with Steve by your side. Poor woots. Wooty, I love the jewelry!!!
lobeliapeppergrass