Join Now
LaynieK 
7:10am Yesterday
I have to write this for my anger management class, but what you are about to read is honest and sincere and completely heartfelt. I am hoping to get some feedback as to how this reads and if anything needs or should be added or excluded.
Dearest Daughter,
First off I want to say how much I love you and how much I am hurting not having you in my care. I look forward to every day we get together and cannot wait for the day you return home for good. It is coming, soon, please hang on.
My purpose for writing this letter is to tell you how sorry I am for all the ways I have mistreated you in the past. I had no right, ever. I should have never let my mental health and emotions effect you in any way. I am sorry for all the fear and worry I have put you through. I promise to you that I will stay on top of things and stay on my medications. I can't promise you that things will always be roses and sunshine, but I will put all my effort into staying well for you, your sisters and for myself.
I am sorry for instigating fights with you and essentially pushing your buttons. I should have allowed you your space and the ability to walk away when you desired. I vowe to you that from this point forward that I will respect your space and boundaries. I will expect the same in return, but I understand that you are a teen and that it will not always be a perfect scenario.
I am most sorry for all the hateful things I have said to you. I will not make excuses. I am the adult and it is my responsibilty to be there for you, not to tear you down. I will be here for you no matter what. I will not judge or criticize you. I will be your shoulder to cry on the ear who listens without making any snap decisions. I will be your friend when you need one and your Mom all the time. I will help you when you want my help and sometimes when you don't. I will build you up and never tear you down. I will be the kind of parent you have always deserved.
I can't take back all the wrong done to you by me, but I sure wish I could. The future however can be changed and it will. Together we will go forward and stregthen our relationship. Although the past can never be forgotten it can be learned from and I have learned, unforturnately the hard way.
I sincerely hope you can accept my apology to you and my pledge to you to right as many wrongs as possible and to continue to move forward, builiding the kind of mother-daughter relationship I for one have always wanted. I love you sweetheart with all of my heart. I am dying without you and will move heaven and earth to get you home. Please know that I am pouring my heart and soul into all I am doing because you deserve that level of respect. I am deeply sorry and know from this point forward there will be no going back to old ways. I understand if you can not trust what I am saying simply by words, I hope though that my actions will gain your trust.
Never give up hope baby, I am always here for you no matter what!
I Love You!
Mom
Comments
That was beautiful. I pray that everything works out for you and your family. That made me bawl, and I pray that your daughter and other children receive this in forgiveness and move forward....awesome job mom...
Scruffy2009
I hope you can appriciate my honesty as how it i intended.....I think you should not need any feed back.....Only you know what is needed to be said. To have have poeple comment on this, I think will take away from your sincerity. This is your own very personal heartfelt letter that only YOU can say.
Take it and go with it.xx
NewSong002
Most excellent.
you may or may not wish to add that: with you ( though edu) the circle w be stopped. as in you are not your parents and their parents.
Layniek, you've came along way in recovery to break the cycle and to become a loving, supportive & nurturing Mother---High Five.
Admiral
I appreciate all the feedback, NewSong, I respect what you said, I guess my insecurity and perfection issues want to make sure this is all I intended it to be and more.
Admiral, I think what you pointed out is right now, however I feared pointing fingers and placing blame would take away from my accountability. Yes I learned this behavior from what my parents did, but I made the choice to repeat the same mistakes. I refuse to let that mistake continue.
LaynieK
wow, i wish that letter was to me from my mother, your children are very lucky Laynie, ideally the past would have been a Rockwell painting, but the fact that you understand the mistakes and recognize them for what they were makes Confidence very high that you will have a happy family again
nice work!
1sickofit
From one mother to another, having a daughter and mental illness that has caused neglect in a lot of aspects of her life, I can understand completely where you are coming from. Your letter was perfect. You wrote it from your heart, and it brought me to tears... you shouldn't change a thing.
I also hope you don't take this the wrong way, but you also made me think... think about all of the wrongs that I have done, all of the times I should have been there and wasn't, and all of the times I neglected the proper care that my daughter needs. Your situation makes me realize that I need to change, I need to be a good Mom, and be there for my child.
I have so much respect for you, and all that you are doing to bring your daughter home. I wish you all the best, and hope that you can be together again soon!
(((HUGE HUGS)))
Personoid
You could write books that everyone would love to read and soo enjoy.
Yrs ago I use to write short letters & poams to my GrandMother about my life and her's.
she ask for me to take things i had writen and have book made. this is yet to be done for life use to be a wonderful distraction from parts of my childhood.
The letter you wrote I would have had loved to recieved from my Mother - it is absolutly perfect.
Most of us my age & your's are still unintenually acting out --releaseing pain w/in.
At same time we come to acknowledge the issue and work though it and over come it putting past behind us.
I agree that my prior post would take away from your letter.
The letter would touch many hearts if your were to post it in your journal thingy on DS.
Iam soo proud of you. X's
Admiral
A heartfely letter..I hope that you and your daughter can mend your relationship through mutual trust and respect. I wish you the best, Laynie...x
lilsquirt
We don't know each other but I always read your posts because they are always worth reading. These letters made me cry - so totally honest and loving and so very hopeful. I think your children are lucky to have you and I hope you get everything you wish for. x
leeigh