KirBir

Open Seasonal Affective Disorder

I discovered that I had SAD shortly into high school but never thought much about ways to make it better. Recently I got a sun lamp and it's helping me immensely.

Treatments

Love Working / Worked

Even though no one quite understands what I am going through, Theron is always there for me to talk to and work through my SAD.

Open Anxiety

I constantly hesitate about things and overly weigh the consequences of my decisions. I fear making the wrong decisions all the time and I get really emotiional over them.

Treatments

Breathing Exercises Working / Worked

I often do this with my meditation, but I also try to breathe slowly and deeply all the time so that I can help stop my anxiety before it shows up.

Meditation Working / Worked

I meditate constantly, mostly for pain management, but also to calm me down and because I'm Buddhist. I try to imagine all my stresses melting away, and then I don't have to worry so much about them anymore.

Positive Thinking Working / Worked

I try to be a Pollyanna type. It not only helps the people around me but helps me to be more positive in my thinking. I try to always have a smile on my face and to always be kind to other people.

Love Working / Worked

My sister, my mom, and my boyfriend are constantly holding me and working through my attacks to help get me right again.

Open Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

I used to have worse OCD when I was younger, but lately it's been getting worse. Mostly it is just about not wanting germs on me or around me, but certain things have to be straight or I can't look at them. I immediately have to fix them. I manage the domestics section of a Kmart and I cannot stand when it looks absolutely terrible and is so chaotic as it usually is.

Open Panic Attacks

When I'm under extreme amounts of stress, I tend to have more panic attacks. I've had them since I was a little girl. They've been getting worse, with me crying and hyperventilating with each attack.

Treatments

Meditation Working / Worked

I also do this with breath control. It doesn't always help that much.

Patience Working / Worked

I try to be patient and breathe deeply so that my attack can pass quicker. It works relatively well.

Positive Thinking Working / Worked

This helps to limit the amount of attacks that I have, but does not help when I'm mid-attack.

Love Working / Worked

My sister, my mom, and my boyfriend are constantly holding me and working through my attacks to help get me right again.

Open Depression

I have SAD but also clinical depression as well. Sometimes I'll be so happy one second and then something will happen and I'll find myself bummed out for hours and maybe even days.

Treatments

Meditation Working / Worked

It works alright. I don't do it often enough though.

Positive Thinking Working / Worked

It works to calm me down, but it is difficult for it to overcome an episode.

Support from Friends & Family Working / Worked

My boyfriend is also clinically depressed and take Effexor. I don't have insurance to take anything, but we always try to work through our depression together, as a team. We almost always manage to cheer each other up or at the least be there to hold each other and cry.

Music Working / Worked

I try to convey what I feel through my lyrics and music so that others can understand better.

Love Working / Worked

Even though no one quite understands what I am going through, Theron is always there for me to talk to and work through our depression together, even if it is just to hold each other and cry until we feel better.

Open Chronic Pain

I have Systemic Onset Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis and am almost always in pain. Usually it is not bad enough to take medicine but that's because I try not to take it as much.

Treatments

Heat Working / Worked

I don't usually use a heating pad, but Icy Hot. It works good for my bad knee.

Meditation Working / Worked

I imagine I'm on a beach. I'm in the shade, and the sun starts to rise slowly, disabling the tree from protecting my pale skin. The sun touches my toes. It rises up my body, and I feel the warmth traveling through me, my body absorbing it like a sponge in water. Finally, it reaches the top of my head, and I am immersed in sunshine, becoming one with it.. It permeates my skin, burning away all of the pain I feel. My body starts to drift back down onto the sand and the sun drifts away.

Naproxen Working / Worked

I try not to take it that much, but the liquid gels work fast and pretty well.

Open Rape

My boyfriend in high school raped me a few times and it led me to think that abuse was okay, that it was normal. I've been raped since, because I put myself in the wrong positions. I want to be here to help other girls get through this without going on the path that I took and partying with the rock n' roll, druggie types.

Treatments

Music Working / Worked

I try to work out my anger and despair in song.

Forgiveness Working / Worked

I am trying to accept it. They may have done something extremely stupid that changed my life forever, but without that would I be the same today? Would I have all these wonderful people in my life? Would I have Theron?

Open Sexual Abuse

I was molested everyday by my best friend from age 6 to 9 or 10. I don't blame her because she had to heave learned all that from someone else, and I feel bad for her for that. I didn't tell my mom until October 07 because I just couldn't bring myself to tell her. One of my mom's former boyfriends tried to rape me in my sleep once as well as trying to kiss me, etc, a few other times. I've also been raped. I want to be here to help other people get through this because it is a very hard process.

Treatments

Leave Working / Worked

After high school, I moved to a completely different state to get away from my memories, my mom's ex, and my ex. I ended up unknowingly moving to the same area as the girl who had molested me in my youth, but Milwaukee is big enough that I haven't run into her and I hope I never will.

Music Working / Worked

I write lyrics and compose music. During the molestation, I taught myself to play the piano so that I could get out some emotion. It still remains my greatest joy.

Talking Working / Worked

I don't talk to anyone about my feelings... except my boyfriend. He and I understand each other in a way that no one else I know can. Even if I don't want to talk about things, he's always there for me, letting me know that it's okay, we're okay, I'm okay. He is the only person that knows everything that happened to me in detail, and is probably the only person who ever will. He helps me more than he will ever know.

Forgiveness Working / Worked

I know that the little girl who molested me, at only a year older, had to have been molested herself. I do not hold a grudge against her anymore for what she did. She only thought it was normal, and I feel for her tremendously.

Open Homeschooling

I was homeschooled from age 6 to age 13 due to my JRA and the school system not being accommodating at all.

Open Food Allergies

I have mild allergies to tomatoes, bananas, strawberries, and most fruits and veggies. I am also - I believe - allergic to shellfish and VERY allergic to phenylanine.

Treatments

Avoid Certain Foods / Chemicals Working / Worked

It usually works. The one thing that is very hard to avoid is phenylanine. It is in almost every gum and mint, with the exception of most cinnamon products.

Open Asthma

I have had asthma all my life, but it gets worse with exercise as well. I don't usually have attacks unless I'm mid-allergy or panic attack.

Treatments

Breathing Exercises Working / Worked

This is pretty much all I can do without insurance. But it works. I breathe very deeply normally and that helps to fight off a lot of attacks.

Open Environmental Allergies

I am allergic to dust, pollen, and various outside sources. I am also allergic to phenyl group, a commonly used chemical base.

Open TMJ

I have had it most of my life, as have a lot of people in my family. Sometimes it gets so bad that I can't see straight.

Open College Stress

I'm in college? and it's stressful? :-P

Treatments

Support from Friends & Family Working / Worked

Eh, sometimes it helps :-P Side effects: far too close to family and annoying my boyfriend far too much haha

Open Family Issues

Treatments

Music Working / Worked

I write, sing, compose... pretty much anything to do with music

Talking Working / Worked

my boyfriend and I talk constantly about my past and family so that I can get past things and fix my issues

Writing Working / Worked

I blog and write in a journal occasionally

Open Tinnitus

It is not as bad as it used to be, but it still sucks

Open Eczema

Treatments

Aloe Vera Working / Worked

sometimes helps a little

Open Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS)

gets worse with stress, associated with my JRA dr said... mostly constipated

Treatments

Avoid Certain Foods / Chemicals Working / Worked

I try to avoid apple juice and other constipators

Open Stress Management

I'm in college with two jobs living at home with my dysfunctional family... 'nuff said

Treatments

Music Working / Worked

happy music helps calm me down

Patience Working / Worked

I try to be pateint

Physical Exercise Working / Worked

dancing is good for expression

Open Shyness

stems from sexual abuse at a young age and homeschooling... mostly bad at school, but virtually non-existent at work

Treatments

Singing Working / Worked

get me up there and in the spotlight

Socializing Working / Worked

not dating, but spending time with friends and my boyfriend

Open Physical & Emotional Abuse

Treatments

Forgiveness Not Working

doesn't help all that much to get me out of situations

Music Working / Worked

Talking Working / Worked

Open Tooth Grinding

I used to grind my teeth terribly, which made my TMJ worse, but now it is pretty minimal