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DianneE 
5:03pm, May 29, 2009
WOW, 2 weeks since I wrote a journal! I've been keeping busy as August is our busiest month of the year....
I have an old car that was wrecked and that I've been slowly rebuilding. It is my favorite car of all time, and it was actually totalled and taken to a junk yard and I made them bring it back! LOL....I can see myself clinging to the back wheel crying no, no when they come and get it for good some day LOL
When it was wrecked, I took the settlement and spent it on gambling.....so it never got fixed. Over the past 19 months I've had gamble-free....I've been slowly working on restoring it. I bought a used side mirror and headlight assembly from a salvage yard...I fixed the rear hatch opener thingee (you can see how knowledgable I am about mechanics LOL).....I fixed the passenger door so it would lock again....I replaced a power steering cable and fluid....had the engine tuned up....doing just a little at a time over the last 6 months or so.
I also started collecting used parts; a fender, bumper covers, etc.....figuring it would be cheaper to have the work done if I got my own parts. So, after saving all Summer, last week I took it and the parts to a body shop and they put my "baby" back together with a new paint job.
It looks and runs fantastic!!!!! I am so ecstatic that I was able to save for this. I feel such a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment. The next task will be to replace the wheels and tires. Three of the wheels are the originals, and one is a mismatched spare, as the original was damaged too much to be safe to drive on! I will be so proud of it when I get nice new wheels that actually match LOL...
For some reason, rebuilding this car has become a symbol of sorts for rebuilding my life.
Other people might have given up on me, and tossed me away for junk....but I didn't given up on myself. It has taken me a lot of time to slowly rebuild my life, piece by piece....a little at a time. I get impatient and want everything to be perfect all at once, but I have learned to savor each little bit of progress. I get so excited with every little thing that gets restored and repaired!
The car, like myself, is still a work in progress....but it is worth the effort.
MY LIFE IS WORTH THE EFFORT.
Comments
Dianne, that is incredible! WOW. I would have never thought to do anything close to that. Very impressive. I understand the analogy of it representing your putting your life back together. Thank you for sharing that... xxoo - debs
JordansMomDebby
CONGRATS to you!! I'm so proud of you for doing this! I'm glad you didn't give up on yourself! You have been and still are a constant source of inspiration to me! I too will rebuild my life one "bumper" at a time. Peace and Love. Patty
mrsfroggie
What a wonderful journal!!!! Rebuilding and re-learning our lives and ourselves is such an important piece of our recoveries.....I think we all felt at one point that we should have just been "put to rest" in a junkyard. Wow, the determination to put a car back together....wish I knew more about how to keep them running. lol. Thank you for sharing your story and your life.....have a great day :)
purplecat
Hi Dianne! So glad to see a journal entry from you. Also so glad to hear that you are so busy enjoying and living your life. I can only imagine how proud you must feel to be driving around in that car....bet you can't quit smiling!! You have been such a huge support and great inspiration to me as I make my way in recovery - thanks for sharing!
Kay1961
Oh WOW Diane! You never cease to amaze me! Right On! What kind of car is it? You are doing a mah-vel-lous job on your recovery! Love you, friend xxxooo
Moyer
Just in case you got the wrong idea, other than driving around and getting parts, i
didn't do the work myself!!! I'm not that talented LOL! I just it in the effort to piece together parts and save the money! Thx for all the encouraging words.... -:)
DianneE
Hi Dianne,
Thank you for noticing my journal entry and commenting with words of encouragement - glad you are doing well - great job on your project of getting the parts - awesome!
Smokeygirl - your sistah!!
smokeygirl
Dianne, your life sure is worth the effort. I have now been clean for 3 months and two days - things are going great and I am so proud of your 19 months....kepp it up sweetie!! Ian : )
prodson
Hey Miss Dianne eee. ''So great to read such an uplifting ,, inspiring 'share. Money sure has other uses.. =rebuild a car that 'was not quite ready for the bone yard..WTG. I hear 'never give up, in your share.'and keep building 'daily , as each part is has to be selected with care to fit ..Amen..
You keep ''doing what you are doing. love it .. such ''HOPE''. It does get better. Amen.
love yah ''Sandra..
gams5
Hi Dianne
Thanks for your comments of encouragement. I'm so happy for you and your "Project". I watched Whitney Huston being interviewed by Oprah the other day after her 7 yr absence from public life due to addiction. She has a new song "I didn't know my own strength"...looks like you found yours again...awesome.
Hugs
Mary
serenityseeker
What a great JE to come back and read after being gone for so long :) Just what I needed to hear. It is reassuring to me that I know things can't change over night. xoxoxo Sandie
Sandie000