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Atay 
8:03pm, July 20, 2009
I have only been to one wedding in my entire life. Now, in June, I'm IN two. I forget that I have two dresses that I can't afford to grow out of. I just forget about it, which I think is not so strange, yet I do want to remember this very real issue when I make my food choices. Also, I have been taking riboflaving and magnesium and avoiding sulfites now for about 3 months and this has changed my life; as I have had 3 to 4 migraines a week. These headaches were life debilitating. I have found some relief from this, yet I forget about it! I don't want to, I want to remember that my daughter's life has changed in this short amount of time because when she comes home from school now it's not the sad, "Mommy has a headache." Then she is left alone for the rest of the day. Nope, I am much more available (I even played jump rope last night with her! We looked up jump rope rhymes on the computer and we tied one end of the rope to a chair and we sang these fun rhymes while she showed off!) I am also able to drive for 2 hours to see some very special clients on very windy (is that how you spell windy, like curvey?) without migraines!
Also, I forget that I am training for a very intense 3 day strength training course in May. It's March. Although I know I could probably make it with my current level of fitness, I actually FORGET this goal and don't attend classes or train for it!
So..................................
I need help keeping track on:
1. WEDDING DRESSES (food choices)
2. MIGRAINES
3. TRAINING
I think I need more information on my relationship as well. I think when I journal, I am going to write how I currently feel about my man. When I have that information over a course of time, it's going to give me insight and I'll be able to weigh out the pros and cons and how I want to go about taking the relationship.
So..................................
4. RELATIONSHIP (because I'll forget to pay attention to or write about this, too!)
I asked my boss (friend, former bulimic, and personal trainer, group instructor, professional competitor, and fitness director at my gym)......
"Why did you hire someone to teach spin classes at the gym when we already have people working there who we can pull from if we need more people?" It was a I'm-just-curious and I'm not blaming question so she was so honest and direct in answering:
"I was asked by this member if she could go for it and I'm not one to discourage anyone from wanting to pursue health and fitness."
I loved her for that. I realized I wasn't being replaced. She is someone who cares for others and if there is a possibility that she can help out, then she supports people. So refreshing.
My relationship feelings this morning: I am taking a break from my man and am at home and focusing on my home and life (getting back to routines is my goal) and I feel very good today. To be honest, today I could easily live without him! Of course he has financial resources that he doles out when I need help and he doesn't mind sharing. That would be something scary for me to let go of because I am at poverty level with an 8 year old whose father has died. There are all kinds of issues around that security, but like I said, "Today, I could live without him." Crap that's hard to write because I know that he will be so supportive in anything I choose. He will be willing to work on our issues. Question is, am I?
Also, I forget that I am training for a very intense 3 day strength training course in May. It's March. Although I know I could probably make it with my current level of fitness, I actually FORGET this goal and don't attend classes or train for it!
So..................................
I need help keeping track on:
1. WEDDING DRESSES (food choices)
2. MIGRAINES
3. TRAINING
I think I need more information on my relationship as well. I think when I journal, I am going to write how I currently feel about my man. When I have that information over a course of time, it's going to give me insight and I'll be able to weigh out the pros and cons and how I want to go about taking the relationship.
So..................................
4. RELATIONSHIP (because I'll forget to pay attention to or write about this, too!)
I asked my boss (friend, former bulimic, and personal trainer, group instructor, professional competitor, and fitness director at my gym)......
"Why did you hire someone to teach spin classes at the gym when we already have people working there who we can pull from if we need more people?" It was a I'm-just-curious and I'm not blaming question so she was so honest and direct in answering:
"I was asked by this member if she could go for it and I'm not one to discourage anyone from wanting to pursue health and fitness."
I loved her for that. I realized I wasn't being replaced. She is someone who cares for others and if there is a possibility that she can help out, then she supports people. So refreshing.
My relationship feelings this morning: I am taking a break from my man and am at home and focusing on my home and life (getting back to routines is my goal) and I feel very good today. To be honest, today I could easily live without him! Of course he has financial resources that he doles out when I need help and he doesn't mind sharing. That would be something scary for me to let go of because I am at poverty level with an 8 year old whose father has died. There are all kinds of issues around that security, but like I said, "Today, I could live without him." Crap that's hard to write because I know that he will be so supportive in anything I choose. He will be willing to work on our issues. Question is, am I?
