jamesross's Journal

  Whew! I finally got some sleep last night. It was off and on, but at least it was sleep. I still feel very tired this morning. Been working so hard on this house we are renovating. So glad this job came up at this time. really is helping keep my mind ocuppied and busy. I'm glad for Paul too. He really is a good person. i'm realizing that I have some major trust issues with people that I need to look at in treatment. Sheldon called about 1am. Dillon had talked to him, and told him I was pissed off. Sheldon said that he only wanted me to get into treatment and not fuck up with the money, so that's why he took it with him. He said that when someone ask him to do something, like hang onto money, he sticks to it and doesn't let them down. Said he loved me and had only my best interest, and was keeping it until I got out of treatment to just make sure I went. Yea, right. I have a hard time beleiving that one. Seems like the only interest he puts first is the one that benefits himself. How many times I asked him to keep clean, and clean the place? Even right after I cleaned everything, it would be just as dirty the next day. Even when he left he only gave me a days notice that he was leaving, leaving me with his four hundred to pay, and never left a dime for all the long distance calls he made to Halifax. All he left was some food he got from the food bank in the fridge, which of course he couldn't take anyway. I never got into all that. I just told him that he should have left the money with Dillon like I told him to so th at if I need it, it would be there. He said he would send it to Dillon today or tomorow. Trust issues...hmmm. Hard not to with people like him around doing shit like that. I'm just glad that this seems to be getting settled. He still thinks I want to live with him in Halifax. Never again. Might go there and see what it's like, but no. I'll never live with Sheldon again. Anyway, feeling a lot better, but got a lot to do. Gotta remember just one step at a time. Thanks Lord.