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Ailie21 
8:15pm, September 6, 2009
Oh man ive had a horrible day. Jacob screamed the WHOLE way from downtown to my house. Everyone was staring at me . I was practically running up the road and i hadnt had anything to eat all day and was totally sweating but he just got louder and more frantic and i couldnt take him out because i had bags of shopping to carry aswel and i couldnt walk any quicker then when i eventually reached home i was all mad at him which made him cry even more so i ended up bursting into tears and sobbing louder than him and he just completely stopped crying to watch me cry (he's never seen me cry and he seemed quite bemused) by that point though i couldnt stop crying. Ive just been holding it all in for so long . horrible day . hate myself sometimes.
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Im always here alone on saturday night. I buy all the junk food for tonight in the morning and wait til she goes out and then eat it al and throw it up. I hate saturday nights. Why can't i let this go?
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OH honey :( Im so sorry. Is there maybe something you can plan to do so you wont be tempted to do that? maybe itll be easier to break the habit if you have something good to replace it with. i know its easier said than done tho. Im always here if you need someone to talk to!
sending you lots of love and hugs!!
jamie
The tears wont stop
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Oh wow sweetie, you did have a rough day. I think that every Mom has moments like those though. Maybe finally getting a good cry out will help you feel a little better. I hope you start to feel better soon :)
ChristinaCat85
Don't hate Your Self... Just Try and Relax...
Being a Parent is Not a Easy Job..But it is Worth every bit of pain and upset..
You will be fine, And Don't Worry about People Staring ,,My bet is they have been there them selfs... You just need to take time and Relax ....You are very new at Being a Mother and doing it alone is hard. But You can do it...It is Ok to Cry.....
BirdDogg
babies are very perceptive to feelings and emotions - if you try realllllyyy hard to seem AND feel calm and in control, then he will pick up on that. xx
girl199017