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  • About Me

    Image of Ailie21

    Ailie21

    Female, 23
    FIF, GBR
    Member since December 26, 2007

    • About Me

      A man found an eagles nest and put it in a nest of a barnyard hen. The eaglet hatched with the brood of chicks and grew up with them. All his life the eagle did what the barnyard chicks did, thinking he was a barnyard chicken. He scratched the earth for worms and insects. He clucked and cackled. And he would thrash his wings and fly a few feet into the air. Years passed and the eagle grew very old. One day he saw a magnificent bird above him in the cloudless sky. It glided in graceful majesty among the powerful wind currents, with scarcely a beat of it's strong golden wings. The old eagle looked up in awe. "Who's that?" he asked. "That's the eagle, the king of the birds, " said his neighbour. "He belongs to the sky. We belong to the earth-we're chickens" So the eagle lived and died a chicken, for that's what he thought he was. Anthony De Mello - Question things, be aware of who you are and what you could achieve if you just took the step and tried. Failure is just an opinion

      A man found an eagles nest and put it in a nest of a barnyard hen. The eaglet hatched with the brood of chicks and grew up with them. All his life the eagle did what the barnyard chicks did, thinking he was a barnyard chicken. He scratched the earth for worms and insects. He clucked and cackled. And he would thrash his wings and fly a few feet into the air. Years passed and the eagle grew very old. One day he saw a magnificent bird above him in the cloudless sky. It glided in graceful majesty among

    • Interests

      Music.reading.serial killers.psychology.theatre.tattoos.film.photography.art.skinny girls.bizarre magazine.crosswords.my boyfriend.my pets.walking.

      Music.reading.serial killers.psychology.theatre.tattoos.film.photography.art.skinny girls.bizarre magazine.crosswords.my

  • Recent Activity

    Recently:

    • 1 hug received

    • Sorry, there is no activity in the My Activity feed.
  • Journal

    • Journal Entry for April 15, 2009

      Mood April 15, 2009 3:53pm

      Oh man ive had a horrible day. Jacob screamed the WHOLE way from downtown to my house. Everyone was staring at me . I was practically running up the …
    • my saturday night

      Mood April 11, 2009 4:02pm

      Im always here alone on saturday night. I buy all the junk food for tonight in the morning and wait til she goes out and then eat it al and throw it …

    • Journal Entry for March 31, 2009

      Mood March 31, 2009 2:44pm

      The tears wont stop
    • so angry

      Mood March 14, 2009 8:46am

      why do i have to eat so much rubbish!!!!!!!!!!!! bread and cake and juice im on the verge of screaming. i can feel the rolls of fat when i sit down …

    • Journal Entry for March 4, 2009

      Mood March 4, 2009 4:33am

      Sometimes i just wish food didnt even exsist.

    Read Journal

  • Hugbook

    Give Ailie21 a hug



    • Hug

      From Franny7 Saturday

      Pls read my journal entry for today. Did they remove my messages from your mailbox too?I have several confirmations that they are going to my friends' mail, and removing my personal e-mails! Good grief. I would not be surprised if they closed my account altogether. Please send me a personal e-mail address just in case!

    • Flower

      From irnbru35 November 3

      hi, your baby is beautiful and so are you!
      hope your okay xxx

    • Flower

      From rennikc October 23

      Unrest of spirit is a mark of life; one problem after another presents itself and in the solving of them we can find our greatest pleasure.
      Kal Menninger

    • Celebration

      From BirdDogg October 12

      Happy Belated Birthday Ailie... I hope You are doing Well !!! Have not seen much of You for a while..... How are You Doing Love ?

    • Flower

      From rennikc October 9

      Miss seeing you online.....but that could also be a good sign that you are doing well and that you don't need the site as much. I bet that baby is getting big. I do hope all is well.

    Read Hugbook

  • Goals

    Progress

    35 %

    Goal End Date is May 15, 08 557 days ago.
    669 days sober. Last update Apr 2, 08
  • Support Groups

    • Close Alcoholism

      I didn't realise drinking was causing a lot of emotional and physical damage to myself until early 07. I would binge drink on roughly 5 days out the 7 and spend 2 days sobbing through anxiety and sleepless nights. Not to mention i was utterly uncontrollable on alcohol and ended up in situations that so nearly lost me my life.At the present i've been sober the longest time in my history of drinking and focusing on bringing a healthy baby into the world. Thats where i get my will power from.

      Treatments

      Cold Turkey Working / Worked
      I said enough is enough after one particularly humiliating bender and i havent been back since.
      Librium Working / Worked
      They certainly reduced anxiety levels. I didn't suffer any side effects.
      Outpatient Treatment Program Somewhat Helpful
      Ok.. i registered with the addiction services and was appointed a support worker and psychiatrist at the hospital but i gave up on both preffering to do it on my own.At the time,i knew they were trying to help but i was still drinking and missing appointments etc.
      Willpower Working / Worked
      This seems to be working .. after my last hospital trip i consciously vowed never to feel that bad again.
    • Close Eating Disorders
      Type: Bulimia

      Having had problems with restricting and obsessive excercise in high school and being very thin i was severly depressed when people started to comment on a little weight gain. I really couldn't control the amount i was eating but found i didnt feel so awful if i threw it back up. So on a daily basis i would binge/purge but became more depressed and gained more weight.I still slip up now and again but because of the baby i force myself to eat and keep it down. Even if its chocolate!

      Treatments

      Psychotherapy Too Soon to Tell
      I didn't give the psychiatrist a chance as i found my memories were so bad and hated having to revert back to early childhood etc. Still.. i would like to one day know why food/body image has always been such a problem for me.
      Support from Friends & Family Not Working
      I hate anyone in my family even mentioning bulimia. I immediately tense up and become very agitated.
    • Open Self-Injury

      This problem started when i was quite young. Maybe around 13. Mixed in with an alcohol problem later on the cuts became deeper and more dangerous resulting in hospital trips and a lot of skin damage.I havent actually done anything recently but it was a total of 6 years that i did cut.There was a period between 16-18 that for some reason i didn't do it.I've yet to pin point that exact reason.

      Treatments

      Psychotherapy Too Soon to Tell
      Same as drink and ed.
      Squeezing Ice Considering
      I was advised to do this and i just laughed it off. So i never tried it
      Talking Somewhat Helpful
      Sometimes it helped but only if i was in the mood to discuss it.
      Tattoos Working / Worked
      Def helped me a good few times! If you like tattoos then this is a must! Sitting for 4 hours of needle work and you def do not feel like causing any more pain to yourself. Plus they heal in the same itchy sort of way. But i'm lucky since i have a friend who tattoos. Otherwise this would be pretty expensive!
    • Open Depression

      Treatments

      Celexa Not Working
      Was crap
      Psychotherapy Too Soon to Tell
      Really hope this works
      Writing Somewhat Helpful
      I enjoy writing but live a chaotic life and can never stick to it
    • Open Food Addiction

      I've been bulimic for over a year now.I just wish that i wasn't but im addicted

    • Open Pregnancy

      Due oct 9th .. baby boy.

    • Open Breakups & Divorce

      It seemed to stop working but i'm having his baby. I'm so sad every day . I know he's moved on .. im trying the same but it just doesnt feel right . Sometimes i just feel like giving up.

      Treatments

      Leave Not Working
    • Open Breastfeeding

      Jacob has been feeding on demand for 9 days now. He feeds a lot!! I initially had milk fever so was very ill but managed to overcome the pain and symptoms and continued to feed. Now feeding is more regulated but still find it very tiring as it is completely led by him .

    • Open Parenting Newborns & Infants (0-1)

      i had my baby boy Jacob on 2.10.08.one week early

      Treatments

      Breast Feeding Working / Worked
      Research Working / Worked
  • Groups

  • Friends


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