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achiot 
Got doctor bills for dad told them to send it to his new address: cemetery.I am so exhausted -no patience for anything. wish my thoughts would be quiet. I realized my luck is so bad . everyone I loved has had a problem that was unexpected and died. Only common antecedent is me. I feel like I started the ball rolling with all of them and they died because I failed them. How can i deal with this. going to sleep and hiding seems to be my only recourse. I have no one left. Everyone I ever loved is dead.
