irisross's Journal

Hello everyone. I wanted to say sorry for not being around or on here much. Kept myself busy the past few weeks. But I want to thank you all for the support you've given me. A few days before christmas I was out shopping and I found a very special ornament for the christmas tree. It was a wreath with a ball on the inside saying God Bless Our Child. I purchased it. I came home and put that special ornament on the tree. And then I cried. But felt relief at the same time. It was a bitter sweet moment. I was glad i had something to have to have a good reminder of such a horrible experience. My husband and I cried. I just felt without having anything i was going to try and hide what we didn't have or was going to have. Now we have something to always remind us of the baby that is now watching over us from heaven. The baby is now with my mom and dad who are up there and i know they are watching over him or her. Makes me feel better. I still have my moments as i am sure i will always have. But thanks to the wonderful friends and support i have here i know i can make it through this. As i am now. Christmas day was hard. Knowning next year we wouldn't have two kids at christmas. But I am sure at some point we will try again. I am just extremely scared that this could happen again. I don't know what i would do if it was to happen. I am so glad that i have my little girl who will be 2, 6 days. So this is an exciting time. She keeps me busy. Thank you all again. Your support and website do wonders. I tell as many people as i can. Everyone one needs to have something good in there life when there are rough times.