Journal Entry for May 31, 2008
May 31, 2008 10:17pm
RobFC 
6:48pm, July 24, 2008
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About Me
RobFC
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About Me
I am by many measures a pretty successful professional bloke. Despite that I can always find fault with what I have achieved, or how I have done it or just with me. I don't like myself all that much at times. I have been battling with the black dog since 1999 and have been getting psychological help since 2002. I have trouble relating to my emotions, although having said that I get pretty emotional at times. I have been married since 1976, but am unable to discuss who I am or what needs I have with my wife. That bugs me and further fuels the black dog. I have health issues - Atrial Fibrillation (AFib), excessive weight, bad knees and back, and sexual disfunction (may be the medication I am taking). I will finish this later...
I am by many measures a pretty successful professional bloke. Despite that I can always find fault with what I have achieved, or how I have done it or just with me. I don't like myself all that much at times. I have been battling with the black dog since 1999 and have been getting psychological help since 2002. I have trouble relating to my emotions, although having said that I get pretty emotional at times. I have been married since 1976, but am unable to discuss who I am or what needs I have with
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What's the date on your next ablation? Does your doc feel it is more likely to succeed?
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Support Groups
Close Atrial Fibrillation (AFib)
I have AFib since 2002 at least maybe longer and am about to have the Cardiac Ablation procedure - May 28, 2008.
Treatments
- Amiodarone Working / Worked
- Was working but not any longer. No observed side effects.
- Coumadin Working / Worked
- No real problems - seems to keep INR in right range.
Close Sleep Apnea
Been suffering Sleep Apnea for some time. Been using CPap machine for about a year. Seems to be working.
Treatments
- CPAP Working / Worked
- Seems to help. Still somewhat tired during the day. A bit of a pain but I always use it.
Open Depression
I have been battling Depression since 1999, and receiving Psychological help since 2002. Used Zoloft for a while, not anymore
Treatments
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Working / Worked
- Working slowly. Have problems with understanding my emotions, at times I am very emotional. Feel there is something in my childhood that I am blocking out.
- Meditation Somewhat Helpful
- Don't do it enough
- Positive Thinking Somewhat Helpful
- Helped deal with some of my anger issues. Still trying it.
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- Is helping
- Zoloft Working / Worked
- Helped at the time. Don't need it now...
Open Impotence & Erectile Dysfunction
Been suffering impotence since 2002 or thereabouts but 'performance anxiety' before that.
Treatments
- Sex Therapy Working / Worked
- Worked at the time, but did not involve my partner. Demonstrated that I was capable - situation has got worse since then.
- Viagra Working / Worked
- This works but my partner does not like the planned nature of it and does not always feel like it. It is also very expensive.
