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Jamie510 
3:24am, November 6, 2009
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This journal entry is viewable only by Jamie510's friends.
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im so sick of crying over that dirtbag that I BROKE UP WITH. why cant i move on??? why am i the one sitting here crying over him while he's moved on with his new girlfriend. this is killing me. i dont know what to do. i left for good reason, so why am i so freakin unhappy. i miss those kids so much. i even miss him. i miss having someone to love me. this hurts and i need to get over it but how???? please god give me the strength to forget him and move on. i hate this. i just want to be happy:(
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You are grieving and it is normal. It will pass, trust me. I do the same thing, but it has gotten easier. The biggest thing for me was to stop trying to figure him out, there is no rhyme or reason to these people. We can't allow them to continue the crazymaking even when they are not with us.
You are young, intelligent, and attractive, you will find a new, healthy minded man who will love you and give you the life you deserve. Have faith, I have faith in you!
Rachel2
Rachel hit it right on the nose. Feeling the same things at times while preparing for him to be served, trying to figure them out makes us think too hard. Stay strong and keep your hopes high!
iamtwitterpatted
Get the facts straight in your mind....You don't miss their love...because if it had been love..They would have kept loving you...and making you feel loved....
It will really help you...To get your thinking straight...It wasn't love..But you hoped and wished it was....Very very sadly..they are two different things.....
WE still feel love..But THEY don't and didn't give you real love..Our love can't exist on an island?....Love is a two way street?...
I do know the painful feelings...except they DO start to go..When you let go of notions that it was a big love..and maybe still could be?..or maybe could have been if only this and that?...Etc...
The truth is...They make it impossible...by their angers..abuse..and nasty behaviours...You didn't make it impossible...HE did..Thats why it also still hurts..
But it is a dream we grieve....It wasn't really something great we have lost...Its actually something horrible and something that made us unhappy...and caused us pain....
Yes it often has its good moments?..But with abuse,....They end up meaning nothing...Nothing can be good if your trust keeps getting broken..and your feelings keep getting hurt and invalidated?...No matter how good the bits are inbetween?...They are ALL RUINED....By the nasty abusive episodes..
Please work on facing the facts....He didn't love you..In any way that could have stayed good?...and its not love..When any abuse is mixed in with good things?..
Love you can trust...Love is stable..Love keeps giving..even when the going gets tough....
Love is patient..love is kind...love is understanding and caring....Love doesn't HURT!!
I'm wishing you peace from your pain...and also..Wishing you straight thinking ahead...Once you get the thinking sorted..It all gets easier...
You will recover from him....and way sooner...as soon as you face the facts about who he is...what he was...and what he always will be...
And that...Is NOTHING you need in your life....Ever again....You are worthy...special..and deserve respect...and REAL love...Big Hugs!! xx
vonniedisley