Journal

It is now over and I am still sitting here confused, crying, can not eat again, and I do not know why, what or where happened? She said it was over and that she was seeing someone else. How can one person do this to another, specially when i was with her through hell, and we were engaged?

well, congratulate yourself for making a start, I'm here if you want to talk feel free if you want to message me,
take care,
L

I never thought about it till I started a relationship with my now former fiancé. When she started sharing with me the sexual abuse she went through, I started remembering some sexual abuse I went through. I love and trusted her, and shared this with her. I also got upset and depressed because of knowing what she went through. Even though it bothered me so much knowing what she went through, I felt despite the pain that I was man enough to support her and be by her side through this bad depression she was going through. I never even considered leaving her for my love and commitment to her was real through thick and thin, and I reminded her of that everyday that I was by her side and was not going anywhere. Instead she left me.

It is hard sharing my feelings for I feel embarrassed about emotional pain. There is still such a big stigma attached to it and people just think you will get over it, or that it is not possible to have as much pain as physical. I feel I have no place to go but this forum, and every time I share I am scared that someone will shoot me down or just tell me to get over it.

I can never be where you are or totally understand the emotional pain you are feeling from being raped, but I can understand emotional pain and how it affects everything in your life and relationships.