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Journal Entry for December 20, 2007 Mood
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Ben is signed to start intensive therapy starting Jan. 3.  The program is ABA based and is 8 hours a day.  I am having a really hard time with this.  This is my little baby boy - you know.  The mom in me just wants to keep him home with me and shelter, but I know he needs to go where he can get help.  My gut is telling me we should do an in home program that is Floor Therapy based, but finanically I don't think we can do it because I have to work full time now in order to pay for his therapy - therefore I would not be able to be home with him.  AGGHHHHHHH, I hate this soooooo much.  I have so many emotions going on right now  - sad, scared, stressed, hopeful....  Everyone says early treatment is the best and he is getting early treatment so that makes me hopeful.  But what if it doesn't help him, what if he doesn't get better.  He is my baby and I can't loose him to this monster....I can't!!!!!!!!  He deserves so much more, so much more.Cry
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