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  • About Me

    Image of 12B4J

    12B4J

    Female, 45
    AZ, USA
    Member since November 25, 2007

    • About Me

      I am physically shipwrecked, trapped in a body of pain and suffering. God has a purpose, even in this, but it is hard to see through a dark curtain and with so many curtains before my face I have to walk only by faith because He is obscure from my view. I know what lies beyond this existence on earth. In this body I feel my humanness, my mortality my need for grace. I am exhausted, beat to a pulp and in constant agony, but I refuse to give up. My flesh cries out, I weep, at times I grumble, I get angry and then get over it. I laugh and smile at little things. I press on, press thru and do my best to move foreward. I fight to live every day...it takes effort...but it is worth it. When these curtains are finally pulled back, I know that God will have created something of great beauty.

      I am physically shipwrecked, trapped in a body of pain and suffering. God has a purpose, even in this, but it is hard to see through a dark curtain and with so many curtains before my face I have to walk only by faith because He is obscure from my view. I know what lies beyond this existence on earth. In this body I feel my humanness, my mortality my need for grace. I am exhausted, beat to a pulp and in constant agony, but I refuse to give up. My flesh cries out, I weep, at times I grumble, I get

    • Interests

      I am very eclectic....love movies, video games, crafts, fishing, hiking, beading, animal rescue, rock hound, collecting vintage anything etc...etc....However, with the multitude of health issues I am now restricted from most physical activity.

      I am very eclectic....love movies, video games, crafts, fishing, hiking, beading, animal rescue, rock

  • Recent Activity

    Recently:

    • 1 hug received

    • Sorry, there is no activity in the My Activity feed.
  • Journal

    • I QUIT!

      Mood September 29, 2008 1:47am

         I QUIT!
    • Journal Entry for August 20, 2008

      Mood August 20, 2008 11:25pm

        Went to Dr. today, basically not much to do to help me. Whatever began these dredful illnesses apparently cannot be stopped. Medical science …
    • EMERGENCY!!!!!!!!!

      Mood August 13, 2008 11:36am

        EVERYONE PLEASE PRAY FOR US ALL. MY DAUGHTER IN LAW JUST WENT INTO LABOR . PLEASE PRAY FOR HER AND THE BABY AND FOR GOD TO STRENGTHEN ME ALSO, …

    • Difficult to talk.

      Mood August 6, 2008 10:12pm

       I don't know what to say. I am doing poorly and I know it , but  I must press on. Grandbaby due on 8/16/08 , I am excited, please …
    • Journal Entry for February 21, 2008

      Mood February 21, 2008 10:46pm

        I am so tired, I'm just so t-i-r-e-d!!!

    Read Journal

  • Hugbook

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    • Rainbow

      From TennesseeKidd November 18

      Hugssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
      and Lovessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
      and Prayersssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

    • Hug

      From TennesseeKidd May 25

      Hugsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss and Lovessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss and Prayerssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

    • Get Well Soon!

      From smj February 9

      Hope you are feeling better very soon!!!! HUGS

    • Hug

      From smj February 2

      Haven't heard from you in a long time....hope all is well! HUGS

    • Hug

      From ragingfog November 17, 2008

      Drive by hug!

    Read Hugbook

  • Goals

  • Support Groups

    • Close Fibromyalgia

      I believe that my fibromyalgia was triggered by a multitude of factors. An auto accident, stress and pneumonia and mononucleosis which I contracted while visiting my husband in the hospital. I was diagnosed by a rheumatologist in 1994,eight years after my symptoms first began. I firmly believe that it is by the grace of God that I am still alive. I thought I was losing my marbles! I was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome in 1989, the prelude to fibromyalgia.

      Treatments

      Acupressure Not Working
      Was not successful, made me very sore.
      Acupuncture Not Working
      This was one of the first thing I tried. It was unsuccessful and made me run fevers.
      Aqua Therapy Not Working
      Made me have dizzy spells.
      Cyclobenzaprine Somewhat Helpful
      Occasionally helpful, must be careful due to coordination problems
      Heat Somewhat Helpful
      Lyrica Considering
      Neurontin Considering
      Considering going back on in a second attempt.
      Ultram Working / Worked
      Vitamin B12 Somewhat Helpful
      Had occasionally helped me.
    • Close Arrhythmias

      In 1995, I was diagnosed with a mild mitral valve prolapse after I noticed that I would have bouts of a fast heartbeat. Today, after multiple monitors and tests, I have been diagnosed with sinus, atrial and ventricular tachychardias. I've multiple episodes of syncope and loss of consciousness, including in a dentists office. I can,t even have a tooth pulled without being in a hospital.

    • Open GERD & Heartburn

      I began having acid reflux in early 2006 while being a caregiver to a disabled friend with breast cancer. I didn't really feel that it was much of a problem being that I was incapacitated already, until I repeatedly developed aspiration pneumonia. I recently had a chest x-ray for an upper respiratory infection at which time I was diagnosed with a hyatal hernia. I can only eat very small portions at a time and it still comes back up.

      Treatments

      Antacids Somewhat Helpful
      Avoid Certain Foods / Chemicals Somewhat Helpful
      Carafate Somewhat Helpful
      Prevacid Somewhat Helpful
      Prilosec Not Working
      Caused migranes.
      Protonix Not Working
      caused migranes
      Tagamet Not Working
    • Open Chronic Fatigue Syndrome

      CFS was the beginning of every other health problem that I have had. I was a cashier when I developed mononucleosis and pneumonia. I tried to go back to work part time but I couldn't work set hours. I decided to start my own cleaning business in 1987 and after 6 months I CRASHED!!!! The fatigue, vertigo, pain and infections kept me bedridden and houseridden for the next 4 years. It was too agonizing to go anywhere or do anything. Rejected by family, I dust myself off and limp on!

      Treatments

      Pain Management Clinic Considering
      Current pain specialist attempt was a bad experience
      Paxil Not Working
      Tried it long ago. In the begining I was depressed, not now.
    • Open Tinnitus

      I have suffered from tinnitus and benign positional vertigo since a auto accident in 1985. It was a foggy day and we were rear-ended, while sitting at a red light. He hit us going 40mph. Thank God for seatbelts, but the force of the impact broke the front seat off the floorboard and we ended up win the back seat with our legs over our head. The incessant high pitched ringing in my ears can drive me buggy, so I have to listen to something even at bedtime. Doctors tell me I have Meneirs disease.

      Treatments

      Neurontin Considering
    • Open Chronic Pain

      I have suffered from chronic pain since 1986, beginning with CFS and moving to Fibromyalgia, it has been a challenge. At the time I became ill, it was common practice to send patients to the Psychiatrist. Social Security diagnosed me with somatoform disorder (all in my mind). I didn't start taking pain meds until 3 years ago when my blood pressure was too high and the cardiologist said I needed to get my pain under control or have a heart attack. I am in need of a good pain doctor.

      Treatments

      Acupressure Not Working
      Flexeril Somewhat Helpful
      Coordination issues
      Heat Somewhat Helpful
      Lyrica Considering
      Neurontin Considering
      Oxycodone Somewhat Helpful
      Physical Therapy Not Working
    • Open Caregivers

      I am a very ill caregiver to two people in my life. One has bipolar disorder, ADD, sleep apnea, restless leg syndrome, learning disabilities, etc. The other has firomyalgia, breast cancer, diabetes, severe cognitive impairment due to auto accidents (19 as a passenger). I am hurting and exhausted. They don't have anyone else to help them. They have been rejected because of their disabilities even as I have. I must prepare them in case my health deteriorates further and the Lord takes me home.

    • Open Deep Vein Thrombosis (DVT)

      2003 gallbladder removed. I had 12 I.V. sites. After I went home I developed arm pain which I thought was fibromyalgia. E.R.>D.R.>ultrasound>hospital=I.V.in foot+Lovenox+warfarin+antibiotics because of D.V.T's in both arms. Sent home on meds, once INR 1.8, Lovenox removed. Clots from shoulders to wrists, one in right subclavian,one in foot. Started back on Lovenox=allergic reaction=BP 225/150=Prednisone+benadryl+ stop Lovenox= warfarin and prayer. GOD saved my life! 2006 Hysterectomy + Heparin

      Treatments

      Coumadin Somewhat Helpful
      During severe clots, needs a boost
      Heparin Working / Worked
      Prevented post surgical clots
      Lovenox Working / Worked
      Worked, but allergic
    • Open Dizziness & Vertigo

      I developed vertigo after an auto accident(see tinnitus). Three months later I woke up with the room spinning fast! My friends carried me to the car and took me to the E.R. A specialist later ran water in my ear and I fell off the bed I was so dizzy. The next three years I slept in a recliner and could not lay flat.

      Treatments

      Antivert Working / Worked
      I continue to use Meclizine as needed. It is sedating but works longer than others.
      Promethazine Working / Worked
      Helps the nausea that accompanies vertigo.
    • Open Hiatal Hernia

      I was just diagnosed with a hiatal hernia in October. It was seen on an x-ray for an upper respiratory infection. I spoke to the doctor about it at my follow up appointment but he pretty much ignored me. I have discomfort much of the time, trouble eating, nausea and reflux.

      Treatments

      Antacids Somewhat Helpful
      Prevacid Somewhat Helpful
      It helps somewhat, it is better than getting aspiration pneumonia.
      Protonix Not Working
      caused migranes
    • Open Hysterectomy

      I began having problems when I was 4 years old with upset tummies. By the ripe old age of 5 I was hospitalized and the doctors performed a partial salpingo oopherectoy. My ovaries were the size of baseballs. They said it looked like a bunch of fluid filled sacks (cysts)in a casing with a stem like an apple! They saved one piece of my ovary and by the grace of God I had a son! I had constant cysts and pain,endometriosis etc. Hysterectomy in 2006, adhesions etc.

      Treatments

      Premarin Working / Worked
    • Open Medical Mysteries

      I had a wonderful doctor who discussed with me the reason for my many malladies. He said that nothing is ever easy for me because in order to get proper medical treatment, I needed to be transported to Area 51 where they study alien life forms. It is now a standing joke on me. My son gave me an alien drivers (flyers) license to top it all off. Doctors aren't God, and sometimes they don't have the answers. I'm trying to get this doctor back (insurance problems). Find a good supportive doctor!!

    • Open Meniere's Disease

      Please read my stories under tinnitus and vertigo.

      Treatments

      Antivert Working / Worked
      Low Salt Diet Working / Worked
    • Open Sexual Abuse

      I was touched, groped and molested by two people in my life who I should have been close to and trusted in. They were 2 of 3 in my life and they were all that I had. My mother had passed away when I was 6 years old. Shortly after that time alcohol and pornography openly came on the scene. To anyone who has ever been through such a devastating and demeaning, downright evil thing such as sexual abuse IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!!!

    • Open Bipolar Disorder

      I am a caregiver to a loved one who is bipolar.

      Treatments

      Abilify Working / Worked
      CAUSED AGGITATION, AGGRESSION.
      Ativan Working / Worked
      CLONAZEPAM, CALMS DOWN
      Celexa Working / Worked
      DID NOT WORK
      Depakote Working / Worked
      SIDE EFFECTS, NAUSEA, FATIGUE
      Geodon Working / Worked
      SLEPT ALL THE TIME
      Lamictal Working / Worked
      RASH, HAD TO STOP
      Lithium Working / Worked
      TRIED, DEHYDRATES
      Tegretol Working / Worked
      SEVERE HEADACHES, AGGRESSION
      Wellbutrin Working / Worked
      WORKS SOMEWHAT
    • Open Depression Supporters

      I have been married to a man who has bipolar,ADD, learning disabled etc. Deteriorating fast. Started with depression 25 years ago.

    • Open Lyme Disease

      Interested in learning about Lymes disease.

    • Open Gastritis

      Sick to the bone, burning stomach, nausea, indigestion, pain thru the back on right side under ribs

      Treatments

      Carafate Working / Worked
      just started
      Prevacid Working / Worked
      headaches, nausea indigestion, bouts of severe lower abdominal pain,diahrea, gas, vomiting and sweating all at the same time
      Protonix Working / Worked
      Tagamet Working / Worked
      ranitidine ...easier on the stomach,
    • Open Sleep Apnea

      Just diagnosed with sleep apnea and sleep disoder.

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