school and such
November 22, 2009 10:32pm
OKAY, yesterday was a long day, buyt it didn't drain me as much as past weeks have done. I actually woke up at 5:00 this morning WITHOUT …
Progress
55 %
dljwriter
1:05am, November 9, 2009
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About Me
dljwriter
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About Me
I'm a writer, a gypsy, a cutter (recovering). Two things can center me emotionally: a baby in my arms, or a cat in my lap. (My cat, Princess died of leukemia last February) I'm in theMaster's program in Counseling, seeking my degree and then my MFT license.
I'm a writer, a gypsy, a cutter (recovering). Two things can center me emotionally: a baby in my arms, or a cat in my lap. (My cat, Princess died of leukemia last February) I'm in theMaster's program in Counseling, seeking my degree and then my MFT license.
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Website
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Interests
BOOKS MUSIC (country, pop, classical) Long walks (when I have the energy. Basketball shopping
BOOKS MUSIC (country, pop, classical) Long walks (when I have the energy. Basketball shopping
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Recent Activity
Recently:
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2 discussion posts, 2 journal posts, 2 hugs received, 1 hug given
Sunday
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dljwriter wrote a discussion post in the Self-Injury support group: a question of faith 11:56pm
Today at church, the pastor was talking about weakness as a gift. It got me thinking about about how,…
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dljwriter wrote a journal entry: school and such 10:32pm
OKAY, yesterday was a long day, buyt it didn't drain me as much as past weeks have done. I actually…
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dljwriter gave tooocrazy a hug 10:23pm
HI, Welcome to the group and the site. It's beena great gift for me at times. I know that I can say just…
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dljwriter wrote a discussion post in the Self-Injury support group: I HATE THIS DAY 11:56am
TODAY, November 22, is the 30th aniversary of finding out about a friend's suicide. Past years, I've…
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Journal
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family and school
November 22, 2009 11:52am
Teru and Bridget are gone. Off to Colorado. (Wish I were there, too.) But I'll be with Aunoria on Wednesday. Thanksgiving …
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creative
November 11, 2009 10:42pm
She walked throughmy window,
passingright through me
and disappeared in the middle of my room
before dawn broke,
before the sky caught fire.
I don't …
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day of rest
November 9, 2009 1:02am
SO, it's Sunday night, and the day has been one of REST.
Had my first extended panic attack yesterday. Woke up with it, and it …
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another day
November 4, 2009 10:21pm
Feeling a bit down. Trying not to take things personally when people are displeased with things I've done. Hard though. …
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Hugbook
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Hug
:-)
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Hug
a hug cause we all need it
Little Love
In case you do not know where this is coming from I read the 'I love you' thread and I just want to say, I LOVE YOU
Hug
Hi :) Nice to see another older woman on here who's also struggling with cutting. I'm actually going back to school for a Psychology degree and want to eventually get into social work of some kind.
Hug
Sometimes I wish we could have mind merge experiences so our depth of feelings can cross all barriers. Love, care, affection, empathy go deeper than touch. At times touch and hugs and physical experiences do not have the depth we need.
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Photos
dljwriter hasn’t uploaded any photos yet
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Support Groups
Close Abstinence & Celibacy
I've been without sex for 10 years--five coming at the end of a marriage in name only. I don't miss the sex, but I DO miss the human touch.
Close Codependency
I'm gun-shy about relationships. The last two were really damaging. And when things go wrong, I cut myself.
Treatments
- 12 Step Program Working / Worked
- I get wrapped up in seeing to others' happiness/comfort, and screw my own.
- CoDA Working / Worked
- An ex-husband who had to have EVERYTHING just right, followed by a roommate who physically frightened me, because he was an alcoholic.
- Emotions Anonymous (EA) Working / Worked
- i moved fromthe bay area to L.A., AND ONLY NOW, AFTER ALMOST A YEAR, FOUND A coda and EA.
- Music Working / Worked
- i'LL BE STARTING THIS WEEKEND. i'M BLIND, AND DON'T HAVE GOOD TRANSPORTATION.
- Pets Somewhat Helpful
- Someone in DBT gave me her cat two years ago. She's my unconditional love: Princess. Calico
- Reading Working / Worked
- Sometimes I lose myself in a book. Other times, I just can't concentrate.
- Talking Somewhat Helpful
- Family can't understand, and won't give unconditional love.
- \"Codependent No More\" Working / Worked
- Don't have the book yet, but I DO have THE LANGUAGE OF LETTING GO.
- Counseling Working / Worked
- can't say.
Open Depression
Type: Clinical (Major) DepressionI was first diagnosed in 2003 with major depression. But my best friend says he saw it coming about five years earlier. It was three years before I found out that Borderline Personality was also diagnosed. THAT explained the DBT. I just wish they'd told me what it meant. When I checked it out, I knew they'd hit the bullseye, but it would have helped.
Treatments
- Cymbalta Working / Worked
- Hard to tell. It helps with depression some, but does nothing for cutting.
- Effexor Not Working
- I was on it for about two years.
- Prozac Not Working
- Tried it for seven weeks. No effect.
- Support from Friends & Family Somewhat Helpful
- People only have so much patience and understanding for something they don't feel or see.
- Wellbutrin Working / Worked
- It keeps me out of the total apathy/lethargy pit.
Open Self-Injury
I'm a "recovering" cutter. It's been about three months, but the desire is still VERY STRONG.
Treatments
- Group Therapy Working / Worked
- Worked when I had it. Then I moved to L.A. and changed insurance, and everything's gone to hell.
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- Again: worked when I had it. Hope to get new health insurance and get back in.
- Rubber Bands Not Working
- poor substitute.
- Talking Somewhat Helpful
- As long as the listeners' patience holds out. But very few UNDERSTAND.
Open Coming Out
I'm transgender: mtf preop. I've lived full time since 2002, but can't proceed to surgery till I "stabilize."
Open Rape
I'm transgender (male-to-female) and was assaulted in Berkeley in 2007. Police said attempted rape. It has rocked my world badly for 16 months.
Treatments
- Psychotherapy Somewhat Helpful
- Family won't talk about it. No one gives me hugs of support. Friends are too far away now.
- Talking Not Working
- friends too far away. No hugs. Want to cut myself rather than cry.
Open Transgender
i STARTED therapy at 36, 7 years into a marriage. I've now lived 24/7 for 6years.
Open Healthy Relationships
Relationships (all) are puzzles I don't seem to have pieces for.
Treatments
- Couples Counseling Not Working
- I was asked to make changes. She wasn't, though we both came in with bggage and undisclosed secrets.
- Patience Working / Worked
- Got tired of waiting for her to grow up.
- Talking Not Working
- She cannot be wrong.
