samh1985's Journal

here i am trying to recover and learn to live with deppression and heres my sister getting hurt by yet another man and feeling suicidal!!! i tell her to talk to me if she needs me like shes there for me! but how can i talk to her when shes going through alot more shit than i am.

 i really love my sister and hate seeing her hurt and if i wasnt risking causing shit for her then i would have a right go at the guy who has hurt her so bad!!

 he might aswell of took a knife and stabbed her himself but he made her mind so fucked up she took the knife and cut herself, to me its still him abusing her!!

 i tried to keep her on the phone to me while my mum was on her way to hers but she didnt want me!! it made me feel even sadder!! she just kept saying to me "i gotta go".

 now when she reads this its going to make her feel really guilty for putting me thru that but the end of the day she knows im always going to be there for her!! my life is put aside for her because im scared one day if im not there she will end up committing suicide.

 she is the closest person to me apart from my kids, yea ok so i have a boyfriend and he should be 1st its not and never will be.

 i just pray shes going to be ok and would prefer her to come live with us or mum while shes like this because were 2 far away to save her from herself.

im usually pretty good with first oppinions but he fooled us all, he acted like he was so nice and loved her to pieces yet behind all that was just a nasty piece of work!! he will end up a lonely old man one day, and i hope he does!! 

anyway im going to sign off here and wait for the call to say shes ok!! but one last thing before i go!!

I LOVE YOU SIS!!!