Electrochique's Journal

Why do I compare myself to other people? I know I shouldn't to it, I always come off inferiour. I went out to dinner last night. I hated it. I freak out in resteraunts, I feel like everyone is watching me eat. The very idea of going out to eat for pleasure baffles me. I don't understand it at all. And who knows what they put in that food. I probably ate like a weeks worth of calories in that pizza. I was doing so well that day too. And one I get started eating I know Its not enough. And I'm not even kiddig, I had a dream that I went round a friends house and said 'im going to eat dinner here this time' because i'd refused it before. Ad I ate this plate of food, and I stopped and I couldn't eat it anymore it was making me feel aim and I started gagging and ran to toilet a threw up. And now that's all that is in my mind.
I'm glad my friends didn't invite me out. They went to the party and it turned out to be petty rough. They wanted to leave but someone had stolen their bags with all their stuff in LOL serves them right.