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NATUK1 
10:50am Monday
well just been my 3 month appointment with my specialist, and went in so confident that all were fine, and did not expect to be told that she recomends that i start treatment , as my CD4 is 345 and VL 360,000 , she wants to start me on Atripla, and I have to go back in a month when i get my head round it all, I knew that time would come, but just were not prepared for it when i were told, My last counts 3 months ago were 475 and 60,000 vl but she says it works on the precentage as well over the 2 years i have been seeing her since being diagnosed . just now feel lost and dont know what to feel anymore,
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Well went to see my specialist today, who were last time mentioning its about time to start thinking of meds, today my counts were 342 cd4 and 160000vl, she said i dont need to start today as the percentage has gone from 18 to 21 what ever than means but if it goes down next time then she will start me on Meds, I had an MRI Scan the other month and asked if the result had come back, it had and showed a slight abnormality what ever that is, she had a second opionion whilst i were there, and then said to start meds now and have another mri scan in 6 months, i am not starting meds yet as i want to see my cfs specialist who asked for the scan, but im wondering now what slight abnormality this is , and apart from that not had a bad day, hope you are all well, NatXX
NATUK1
well thought it was about time i updated my journal , first its my birthday today 37 , but dont feel it, well decided with the specialist that i would start on Atripla next week, as my cd4 is now at 250 and as she wanted me to start meds last october, i think i have put it of long enough , but was just so concerned about the side effects from the meds, but hey i have no choice, so i will let you know how i go from the 09th March, have to collect my meds on the 6th but as im working over the weekend, she said to wait till the monday after work, as i have the week to get used to them, as i am a night owl, i have been recomended to take them at 11pm, i have been adviced to stay in for a while at nights till i get used to them, apart from that i am not to bad, my m.e is keeping me back and slowing me down but i cant complain its about changing your life i guess , going to start looking for a new job, as whilst i have been inmy current one for nearly 2 years i am finding it so hard to keep up with the phsical side, and cutting corners of which i am getting away with but feel so guilty that i am not doing the job i get paid for, and its only a matter of time before someone notices, going to see the film benj button tonight at the cinema, saw slumdog last week, was a very good film, well hope everyone has a nice week ahead, all take care and look after your self, XX Nathan XX
NATUK1
well had a call from the clinic on the 06th to say that my meds would not be ready till the 09th, Monday - of which i am going to collect them, but i am having doubts about starting them this week as i have a busy week, and dont need to feel ill, knowing that i need meds is far worse than when i was diagnosed, im going round the bend just thinking about it, and all my friends have been so supportive, but its me i am being silly and yet i feel so trapped, XX
NATUK1
well i intended to wait to take my meds until i come back from holiday next week, but last night i had the sudden urge to start taking them, and at midnight i tok my first Atripla , then around 2.30 i had this feeling like a glow all over my skin, and a strange protective dream, what involved a wall of trainers, my breathng has gone a little shallow, but it was not as bad as i thought it was going to be, a little light headed, and my eyes are very heavy but i guess i did not sleep well, its not been a bad day considering, Nat xx
NATUK1