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BasketMoon 
5:05pm, November 14, 2009
Almost packed now....just a few last minute things to go. I can hardly wait!
Been trying to keep myself busy and my mind occupied without overdoing. Between getting ready for Halloween and the cruise, I have plenty to do. Yesterday I overdid just a bit so I had one of those fibro nights....couldn't sleep! I'm hoping just to rest today. The kids will be over at some point during the next week to help me finish up the decorating. We are expanding our decorations to outside the house this years.
Darrel's sister is supposed to be back this weekend to go through his stuff AGAIN! I don't know why when they went through it last weekend, they didn't begin to throw some of it away. There are tons of magazine articles that he cut out over the years...furniture and architecture that he liked. They just sorted them and put them back in the boxes. ??? So this weekend they want to come back and go back through it and throw that stuff away. So I get to look forward to another weekend of Darrel reminders all over my livingroom and people invading my house.
Can you say "feeling used"??? I realize it's hard to part with Darrel's belongings. But I wish they would just take everything home with them and deal with it however they want to deal with it there. I just don't need the continued stress. I feel badly that I have avoided her phone calls but I need the break. Dose this make me a bad person?? I know she needs support and I've been there consistently for the last 2 weeks but I just can't deal with any more right now. We still have to deal with 2 storage units he had in Ventura county after we get back from the cruise so I'd like a bit of a break until we have to really delve into the things that really matter.
I'm so tired and hurting and realize I'm probably just rambling so I'm gonna dog it off for today.
The dragon is laughing hysterically today!
Comments
It will be good to get away - for so many reasons! We ordered two more suitcases today - I always thought I was the one who overpacked but apparently it's not just me LOL
Walking about with hand sanitizer and there are cans of Lysol all over the office - going to stay well and do this! Jon thought he was getting a cold but turned out it was just his mold allergy acting up from all the damp weather.
Maybe you need to be more "direct" with Darrel's sister and ask that they take away anything they're not sure about - you gave enough of yourselves when he was with you - you don't need to be a free storage facility for his family while they work their way through whatever they're dealing with.
You are NOT a bad person - but the solution to being "used" is to say no. When they arrive, put it out there first thing - "I know you're dealing with his death just like we are, but I really need you to take his things with you, as we're leaving for a week and need to get this done before we go" or something like that - whatever feels right to you - it's perfectly OK to ask for what you need.
PeaceN2You
NOPE this does not make you a bad person. It makes you a person who is just tired and needs to let things settle before going through any more. You really need to tell his sister that they have to take the things to there place to go through it and discard and/or keep what they want. Just tell them you are not feeling well and can't take the stress. I would think they would be very sensitive to that. I hope your Halloween adventures turn out to be fun for you and the CRUISE will be perfect at the end of all this. Don't forget about the manhattan I want you to have for me - oh, by the way, I like it with just a little brandy and mostly sweet vermouth. Thanks!!! LOL Have a good day. SUE
suecalifornia
I just read your note to Basket Sue. We are on the same page. HEY, have fun on the cruise - you have a manhattan for me too. Wish I could be with the two of you NUTS. Love, Sue
suecalifornia
Gosh! You've been through so much this year and need some peace. I'll pray someone will step in for Darrel's sister so you can get some rest - 'cause you're not just going on a cruise just to lay around.
Oh, you two are going to have so much fun!
unduki