Where I am right now
August 5, 2009 6:55pm
For the last few weeks I have been sad. I thought this was a good time to get back in therapy. i have not been in therapy since a …
Progress
85 %
jeanette474
9:07am, December 25, 2008
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About Me
jeanette474
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About Me
I am a survivor of sexual, physical and emotional abuse at the hands of 2 foster families. I was taken away from my bio mother at the age of 2 and then put in one home for 16 years and then lived with the foster parents daughter, an untreated sexual abuse victim as well. I have been in therapy since 1987 and have grown stronger.I am very extroverted and because I am it is easy for me to talk to others and also to share my story. I do not want to make my story my identity, but as everyone here knows healing from sexual abuse is a long and painful process but worthy of the struggle. I have also realized that to be an effective person in other people lives, I must first be effective in my own life. My reason for being on DS is to share all that I have gone thru, and to also share my hope for my future. I am a determined person to heal these wounds that I have carried for way too long.
I am a survivor of sexual, physical and emotional abuse at the hands of 2 foster families. I was taken away from my bio mother at the age of 2 and then put in one home for 16 years and then lived with the foster parents daughter, an untreated sexual abuse victim as well. I have been in therapy since 1987 and have grown stronger.I am very extroverted and because I am it is easy for me to talk to others and also to share my story. I do not want to make my story my identity, but as everyone here knows
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Interests
I love to draw and paint. I love to write poetry, most of my poetry is my feelings regarding being abused. It has been very healing to get in touch with my pain and to be able to write about it. I am interested in the history of women and why we as women have been opressed down thru the ages. Out of my abusive past the activist, the advocate has emerged.
I love to draw and paint. I love to write poetry, most of my poetry is my feelings regarding being abused.
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Recent Activity
November 10
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jeanette474 commented on askannie2000’s journal entry Will i ever forget this? 12:37pm
Very well said Annie. All you can do is move thru these flashbacks, this anger, this rage and in time…
March 18
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jeanette474 turned 62 12:00am
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Journal
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All is Well
June 18, 2009 8:24am
I felt the need to write this as I was just talking to my husband. Yesterday when I came home I found my husband and his Mom to be talking …
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Another day of silence in my house
June 11, 2009 2:23pm
I have been sitting here at my computer and studying perspective drawing. Glad I have this time to study. I am trying to draw a barn that …
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On vacation for a much needed rest
June 9, 2009 6:04pm
Today was my second day of a week long vacation. I choose today to take my camera and take pictures that I would like to draw. I drove …
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Watching TV programs about rapists and the horror they perpertrate
May 9, 2009 11:47am
I just finished watching a show called I.D. Investigation Discovery. The story was about 2 men, one who was in jail for the rape of a woman and …
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Hugbook
Chicken Soup
~for the soul~
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Hug
Hello Jeanette,stopping by,How are you doing? ((((jeanette))))
Hug
I read your story. I am so proud of you not giving up.
Hang in there.
Ray of Sunshine
Hi Jeanette, are ya doin ok? I read your last journal from Aug. I hope therapy is going well for you. Well wishes and hugs
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Moment of Peace
so its been awhile since ive caught up with you.. how r u?
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Photos
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Support Groups
Close Sexual Abuse
I am a 60 year old woman who has been in recovery for the last 20 years dealing with sexual, emotional and physical abuse by a foster family. It is by far the hardest journey I have CHOSEN to take. Had I not gone into the pain, I know I would not be here to talk about a life of pain and anguish. I am a survior and very proud of the work I have done to heal. I am presently in EMDR therapy. I know that in all the pain, I am becoming a more intergrated person.
Treatments
- Art Working / Worked
- I find when I draw the wounded child and how I remember her to be, I feel relief, a perging of my pain
- Group Therapy Working / Worked
- I know having been in group therapy that I was not alone, that there were others who were feeling the same things I was feeling i.e fear, anxiety, rage, anger, sadness
- Leave Working / Worked
- When my mother in law was abusing me verbally when I first started to live with her, I physically and mentally left. After numerous confrontations with her I no longer have to leave. I stand my ground which has been very effective
- Massage Working / Worked
- I have done Trager massage and found that it brought out body memories.
- Music Working / Worked
- Music soothes my soul, especially Enya. She has a voice that calms me when I am scared, or anxious
- Reiki Working / Worked
- When I had breast cancer in 1997 two friends performed Reiki on me. I felt it was helpful.
- Talking Working / Worked
- Just having someone who will listen to my pain and empathize with me has been very healing.
- \"The Courage To Heal\" Working / Worked
- This book was my bible when I first started therapy. Wonderful book.
- Poetry Working / Worked
- Most of my poems are about the sexual abuse and have healed me significantlly because I have purged my pain, and wrote it down.
Close High Cholesterol
I am a diabetic. Have been on a few meds for high cholesterol and most have had bad side effects. Would like to find a natural way to lower my cholesterol because every med I have been on I have side effects that are very uncomfortable. I have high triclycerides as well so the doctor put me on Tricor. I have not taken it for a few days and am feeling very spacy.
Treatments
- Red Yeast Rice Not Working
- Tricor as well as Lipitor and Crestor have all left me with strange side effects
Open Anxiety
I suffer from anxiety due to the many abuses I suffered as a child up until I was 23 and moved out of the foster home I was in. I am the kind of person who will face my fears and overcome them.
Treatments
- Breathing Exercises Working / Worked
- I find that when stressed if I do deep breathes it helps to calm me.
- Breathwork Working / Worked
- Meditation Working / Worked
- Sometimes it works.
- Positive Thinking Working / Worked
- In spite of feeling anxious and fearful I seem to face the fear and the anxiety and look at it as all part of the recovery process. I no longer think every day will be like some of the anxious days that I do experience
- Poetry Working / Worked
- When I am anxious I write a poem to get in touch with where the anxiety is coming from. The poems usually get to the source of the anxiety
Open Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
I am a survivor of childhood abuse, sexual, physical and emotional in a foster home. Presently I am experiencing what I believe to be PTSD. I have been in therapy for the last 20 years. I am presently in EMDR therapy with the hope that a lot of the PTSD symptoms will be allievated.
Treatments
- Art Working / Worked
- I love to draw and paint. I find that when I am being creative, the joyful inner child emerges. I also write poems to express what the inner child in me is feeling about being abused.
- EMDR Working / Worked
- I have only had one session. Would like to work on finding a safe place within my psyche
- Music Working / Worked
- I love to listen to Enya when I am stressed. She soothes my soul and spirit
- Poetry Working / Worked
- Writing poems an getting in touch with my wounded child has helped tremendously
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- Therapy works. In spite of what I am going thru regarding PTSD, I know this is part of the process. I WILL see the process thru!!!!!!!
- Reading Working / Worked
- I read ever book I can on PTSD. I helps when I am not in therapy.
Open Diabetes Type 2
I am a type 2 diabetic. My sugar right now is not in control. I take Metformin and Januvia. I feel that the Metforim is creating anxiety and want to know if others have had this experience. I was on Glipizide for many years and had NO side effects. Think I will ask my doc to put me back on Glipizide. Problem is I have high sugars when I wake up. I seem to have dawn phenomenon and ever since I noticed high blood sugars in the morning were high in the 200 range
Treatments
- Glipizide Working / Worked
- This med worked, no side effects. Need to ask the doctor why I was taken off of it and put on Metforim.
- Januvia Working / Worked
- I take this in the morning and it does bring my sugar down in quickly.
- Metformin Working / Worked
- I read on the internet that this drug can cause anxiety, which all of a sudden I am experiencing since I have been on it for a few months.
Open Foster Care
I am 61 and was a foster kid from 2 years old to 23 years old. My story is not one of happiness
Open Rape
I was raped by the neighbor across the street from me when I was a child, maybe the age of 9 or later. I did not know I was raped, or could not say the word rape until I went into therapy and told my EMDR therapist about the flashbacks I have had regarding this rapist.
Treatments
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- Have been in therapy since 1987. Have finally stopped therapy because I feel I have significantly healed, but will go back if necessary
- Rape Counseling Working / Worked
- I have been in therapy since 1987. Have done a lot of hard work to heal. Therapy does work, but I had to do all the work to heal. It had been well worth it.
- Talking Working / Worked
- I have told many people about my abuse. Have written poems and publically read those poems about being sexually abused. I am an advocate and activist, if only in my small area of the world.
Open Incest Survivors
I am a survior of incest by a foster parent I lived with until he died when I was 9 years old.
Treatments
- EMDR Working / Worked
- I have been in therapy for 20 years and have healed to a great degree. All the therapy I have had all the books I have read all the support groups I have joined have all been benificial in my healing.
Open Stress Management
I work in a vocational rehab for people with mental health dx's. I am exhausted due to the constant demand for my attention, interruptions when I am working at a task, and the lack of independent thinking on the part of the members of the facility I work at.
