music
my music is up as loud as it gets. i can feel it literally vibrating my chest. such a wonderful feeling! i'm like swimming in music. …
ummmm....what's there to tell? ask if you really want to know.
ummmm....what's there to tell? ask if you really want to know.
I love writing, reading, learning, and playing video games.
I love writing, reading, learning, and playing video games.
my music is up as loud as it gets. i can feel it literally vibrating my chest. such a wonderful feeling! i'm like swimming in music. …
thank you its been relay upsetting lately idk wats going wrong with me ive been trying to be good but yea..i just want to give up still v.v hope u read my story but yea idk
Know that no matter what happens the walk through a year is HELL. When I say Hell, I mean f-ing Hell. What did I do? When in the midst of an urge, throw myself in a crowd of people. Apply ice cubes against my skin... just basic stuff. And a lot of luck.
38 days left to one year without cutting.
Thank you for the support!! Today I am going to talk to a counselar and feel better.
Bye =)
ew, homework sucks. yeah...i hate fighting urges. it takes so much effort. i usually end up watching movies to keep myself from doing something i'll regret. idk if that would help you at all....
It's kinda like Cystic Fibrosis. I have two main problems. My pancreas can't digest or absorb much food without pancreatic supplements, which help only part of the time. The other problem is that my bone marrow is really weak. I don't produce a lot of white or red blood cells, or platelets. normal count of neutrophils= 3000+. mine normally sits about 800. Really low. I also have short stature, bone density problems, and my bone marrow could develop into leukemia or bone marrow failure.
I started self injuring myself as a sophomore. When that didn't help anymore, i moved onto cutting as a junior.
I've been through 2 divorces in my life, due to my dad.
I am a shy, reserved teen. I don't talk much, and I can't stand when people just talk to talk, or when they feel like they need to keep talking to keep up our conversation.
I have been verbally, socially, and mentally abused for about 10 years. About two years ago, I was abused physically as well.
I don't have cancer atm, but i am in a very pre-cancer stage. they are just waiting til i get it or until i need a bone marrow transplant. i get blood drawn every month, and bone marrow biopsies every 3-6 months. check my sds syndrome for more detail.
my dad has divorced twice.
i am currently a freshman.
born with a left ear hearing loss, because of three tiny bones in my ear. one is malformed, and therefore, lost most of my hearing.
this past summer, i had my one and only testicle remaining, ripped out by doctors, due to cancer precautions, it being pinched, and very painful. obviously, i'm infertile. or sterile.
grew up forced to eat meat as a child. still am when i go home.....but i've finally "come out" and quit eating meat. i'm a lacto-ovo vegetarian, i guess.
it takes me forever to fall asleep. hours. i have no control over whether i sleep or not.
my dad has divorced twice. i luckily don't have a step family on that side to deal with. my step dad is amazing. i don't have any step kids on that side to deal with either, so my step family situation is pretty okay right now.