OrphanAnnie's Journal

Well, the axe has finally fallen at work.  The good news is that I still have a job, the bad news is that they're moving me from I.T. back into my old department as a transcriptionist.  Oh, and the further good news is that even tho I see that as a demotion I won't have to take a cut in pay.  The bad news is that at the very least 5 other people I know have been laid off -- I apparently came within a hair's breadth myself.  I'm glad I had an extra half tranquilizer to take; despite having a job I'm still very shaken.  Our firm is too large to go bankrupt, but I wouldn't rule out the possibility that in another 6 months or so they might lay off again.  At any rate, they gave good severance packages to the people who were laid off, from what I hear, more so than they really had to do, and that's to their credit.  Also good is that the department I'm going to does have a lot of business right now, so hopefully that will be stable.  In a way, this is vindication for my view of my role in the I.T. department; I've known for a long time that I didn't have the training I really needed for it (I was grandfathered in) and have more or less expected to be laid off or replaced for several years.  I'm not rejoicing in being expendable, but with the emotional problems I've had it's reassuring to know that my judgment is good and that I really do see what I think I see.  Talk about finding a silver lining in a cloud!  The other good news is that since I worked in that other department before I went to I.T., I feel very much like I'm going home.  The hardest thing, with my ADD, will be to sit quietly and type and not be tempted to visit others or chat.  But I'm older and wiser than I was when I was there before and I'll manage.  Now if I can just manage to make myself eat -- I hope the stress doesn't send my BG into the stratosphere.  Tomorrow will be rough, too -- going to work to get the final count on who's been let go.  Even tho I've been assured I will not be laid off, I still feel like they could change their minds tomorrow and let me go.  That's unrealistic, altho I suppose theoretically possible, but I feel like I'm still at risk.  I hope I can sleep tonight.....