DAY 1 This is the beginning of …
DAY 1 This is the beginning of what I hope will be the next best part of my life. I struggle with an addictive …
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mindypanebianco 
I gambled today after not gambling for so long, I can't believe I did it, I know I can't take it back, but I made a huge mistake. There was no reason for it, I feel dirty and disgusted it for doing it, I am so stupid, I erased all my goals and set up new ones. I need to get my myself together, and get everything back in order again. I will wake up tomorrow and I will not look back. I will start back at day 1 again and I will not do this again, I am going to find a GA meeting around, I know I need more help, maybe talking to more people will do some good, I have everyone here, but I think need more. Well I am going to take a shower now and wash away the filth, and get ready for bed, I have work tomorrow anyhow and I am on my sixth day of working so I guess my mind is not here. Everyone have a GF weekend, I think I learned my lesson again.
Hugs,
Mindy
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I'm so sorry that you are feeling so down. I understand exactly what you are going through. You are right- we can't change the past, only decide on the future. You are a very strong woman and you can do this. I know that for me always trying to quit two addictions at once is very hard. Smoking and gambling tend to go hand in hand with me- when I break one I break the other. It is insanity, but it is my reality. I am starting over at day 1 on smoking tomorrow and a good plan for my time alone Monday so hopefully I will be able to quit both for good this time. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day, Know that I am here for you. Have a good rest :)
purplecat
Dear Mindy, I'm so sorry you are feeling so down. But you have the right attitude, tomorrow is a new day! You know all too well, that many of us have slipped after days and months of recovery. It's something to learn from and you will. I know you will get right back on track and carry on with your recovery. You are in my prayers and I send you a super loving hug!!! I'm here for you as you have been for me. Peace and Love. Patty
mrsfroggie
P.S. You're not a loser!!!!!!! You're a wonderful friend!!!!
mrsfroggie
Tomorrow is the new day. To have the new beginning when you see the light is the gift we can all give ourselves. I have been told it is our search for the "WHY" that we forget the "HOW" of being. I am right here with you.Be happy for your new day...smile @ the clouds, maybe the sun if it's around.
MTgirl
Mindy - I hope today is finding you better and that you are feeling better. I know those feelings and I know how wanting to take a bath or shower to get rid of that gambling filth seems to help. You will get through this. You are a wonderful strong woman. You can do this. So, you slipped.. that happens when you are an addict and you are in recovery.. But today get back on that recovery wagon and move on!!! Be strong.. Keep busy.. read journals, write in your journal and know that we are all here to support you. HUGS!!!
Crissy11
When God takes things from me, I feel like such a loser. I would gamble so long and hard that I would lose contact with the outside world. I didn't realize that he had other plans for me. I think we all face that problem. The chaos in our minds keeps us from appreciating the good things in our life, until they are taken away. I lost my father-in-law, who I really liked, in September. I became a member of DS in November and pledged that I would do better. I had been so busy gambling that I didn't spend as much time with him or even help him financially. He was taken away so fast that I didn't even get to tell him goodbye properly. I even gambled when I left the hospital to pick up some clothes for my wife. I spent an hour gambling while they waited on me to come back. I was blinded while he lay dying. Gambling is the loser, not you. It is a sick, dirty, nasty thing that infects us all. Don't beat yourself up over it. Forgive yourself and try to live and love before it is too late and you are singing my sad song.
I will not gamble today.
chris
jcdob1
Dear Mindy,
A big hug goes out to you right now. I know you will be feeling low. One thing you need to know - you are NOT a loser. I know the feelings you feel right now are horrid. I have been there many times and during recovery. It's amazing how things can change from one day to the nect. We have ALL been there.
Please don't be too hard on yourself. Stay strong. You can do this. This I see as a bump in the road. My friends here reminded me of that when it was me in your shoes. - if I bet tomorrow it would be but only through Gods Grace it isn't Just for today.
We are here for you always. Please know you are not alone.
- Hugs and love Suzi
Auzgurl