mrcoffee's Journal

HATE… possibly the third most powerful word in the English arsenal. Am I a hater? You bet, I won’t lie, I HATE!

I made Christie Brinkley laugh once and I hate that.

I didn’t see her next to me at a stoplight as I was demonstrating a brilliant Ozzy Ozburger performing MR CROWLEY to a carload of friends when someone yelled HEY ITS CHRISTIE!

I turned without breaking character and the two all beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese onion on a sesame seed lipped pickle tongued Mr Ozburger said AWW CRUD! Then she bust out laughing and left me in despair at the light. She never called…

I HATE THAT

After I got out of the military I took the civil service exam and scored a 105. Eight months later I moved across the hall so the post office locked my mailbox. I finally got it opened only to find I was to report for service yesterday or my application will be dropped …

I HATED THAT

I had a beautiful little red, white, and blue Ford Mustang. V-8; 5 speed, buckets, Edilbrocks, Hookers, and that big foot on the gas peddle. Even had 8-track. I was headed home after work on a wintry Saturday, no problem. I signaled left to cut on the boulevard, dropped it into fourth and pushed the go faster peddle when I hit the ice… she only did a 180... I was sliding on the freeway at 55… BACKWARDS.

I sat back in my seat, looked up at the headlights and shouted QUK! (or something that sounded like that) in time to slide into a utility pole…

I HATED THAT

People tell me maybe I’d have better luck if I got a nicer attitude.

I hate that too…