desrtrse's Journal

Ok I am steady 46lbs down, have about 20 more to go, only having 1100 cals a day and I am getting really tired of this! I don't know what else I can do to get the weight off. I am clearly not ready to stop but seems like it won't happen. To make it worse we have had dark rainy days here for 2 mos now and I am falling fast. I need the sun, I cannot thrive in the dark, literally! I just want to get in my car and drive out of this hell but I can't. It doesn't help that I am still stuck in arkansas which is the worst place on earth to have to live, I am completely alone and can find no way out cause my income goes faster than it comes. omg this is no life and what is the fighting for anyway if I have nothing. I just wanted to feel better in my body and it was working really good while the weight was coming off but now getting to  the end seems hopeless and ever being able to make enough money to live on is another dead end. I have been looking for part time work to get some financial relief but I only find that I am not qualified to do anything and have no experience to do the low income jobs and at 55 no one is willing to give me a start. So yep stuck place with no vision out. I hate my life and it seems no matter what I do I cannot change this destined misery