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anitaama 
Okay it’s official. I am depressed. I lost my job back in Feb and have not received any income, except for SS and the money Frank gives me for rent since then. I need more than that to cover my bills. My finances are a mess. Now I finally got some leases with my Apartment locating job, but it takes so long to get paid on these. Not my companies fault, it is the Apt. complexes take their sweet time paying on these things. When they start coming in I will be alright. In the meantime I need to get some extra money, I tried to have a garage sale. Guess what. Hardly anyone showed up. I spent days going through my things and pricing everything. What a bummer. I didn’t do ebaby causse I need immediate cash. I’m glad I already have my ticket to NJ. I really like the apartment locating job, but it is really difficult. There is so much competition out there and people do not remain loyal to you. One little girl I tried very hard to help, who had a drug charge on her record, went and rented something without using my name. I tried so many places to try and get her rented, then she turns around and does this. That is just one incident. I have however, helped several very nice loyal people. When it works it is very rewarding to me, to find people a nice place to live. As many of you know or remember I bought a car back in Jan. before I knew I was going to lose my job. I did manage to get one deferred payment from Ford Credit. I may have to ask for more. I have been on several interviews for part-time jobs but no luck. I cannot even get arrested. (joke). Some of it I think due to my age (63) and also because I am a Cancer survivor. I do want to continue with the apartment locating but I wanted to get something else to supplement.
Tomorrow I am going up to baby-sit Christian. Rob and Sara are going to a wedding. Sara is going to take Heidi with her. She is breast feeding and Heidi won’t take a bottle. Seeing the kids always perks me up a bit, so I am looking forward to it.
Thank you for listening to my rant. I will be okay.
Love and hugs to all of you.
Anita
Comments
Oh Anita, I so wish the job situation would get better for you and everyone else. I don't know if you already have this resource www.canceradvocacy.org but I got some wonderful literature for free from them. Some of it deals with job-related issues. This organization is the National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship. It won't get you a job but it is helpful information. Have a great time with Christian and seeing Heidi before she goes off with her parents. I will keep hoping and praying that something good turns up. Best wishes and hugs, Janet
IUPUI
Dear Anita
I`m so sorry that you are still dealing with your jobless situation. However, if you look at it positively, presently you have your health...which is more than some can say. I`m happy you have your NJ ticket, as you certainly deserve a respite and time away from your worries.Have fun babysitting this weekend and try to enjoy your Mother`s Day!Things will get better, don`t forget you`re a SURVIVOR :)
xxLinda
Lindaheff
hang-in, Anita, you are not alone on the job issue. I still haven't heard from McGraw-Hill!! I am looking elsewhere of course, but nothing has come that I can do from home. Linda's right, we must remember we (you and I) are fortunate in that we are not battling a recurrence. I have to sell the house next year--ugh! I hope we both get the employment we need soon!! thinking of you-love and purrs
RhodaM
Thanks Janet and Linda. Yes I do have my health. Maybe you can't have it all. But why not dammit! I know this will turn around. It's just that I have been dealing with so much crap since I was DX. That is when it all started. I lost my job and health ins. Been down hill ever since. But like you say, I have my health. I have been cancer free for almost two years so I thank God for that.
I hope to have lots of fun with Christian tomorrow. If it is hot, and I am sure it will be, it has been in the 90's, I will put him in his blow up pool I bought him for his Birthday last year. It is quite large. I can get in it with him.
Thanks again.
anitaama
I am sorry I missed this entry. It is hard to find a silver lining in this but I know things are going to work out for you Anita. I still believe you have a gift of speaking to survivors.. You have given me so much through my ordeal. Wishing you the best Mother's Day and will be sending great thoughts to you for a job. So much love....Beth
buttany1
Thank you so much Beth. I am feeling much better today. You know how some days, even though the situation has not changed you feel better about things. I guess it has to do with attitude. I am not usually a depressed person. I have gone through so much in my life without sinking to the pits. This is just another bump in the road.
anitaama
Hi Anita, I just read this today ( Sunday) . You have every right to get depressed and to rant once in a while. I like you don't get really down often but you have every right to feel the way you do. I hope you Mothers Day is a good one and you have a great time with the grandkids. That is a real upper for me also. When I come into my first million I'll send ya some of it. I will pray that your luck turns around soon. Take care, Carol
caroltuc
I'm really rooting for the appartment job to pick up for you.. It's great that you have found something that you enjoy doing and it is early days still... Perhaps now that you have got things sorted to sell it would be a good idea to try ebay. Wishing loads for the best things to cme through for you.. Huge hugs.. xxx
Halli
Hi Anita, I am just getting to write this to you now - interestingly the Indianapolis Star (our local newspaper) had an editorial on Saturday that focused exactly on your issues - out of work and depression. (www.indystar.com) I've had my own frustrations with my job - being passed over I think because of the cancer and my age. It's amazing how down things like that can get us even when we are doing okay in the cancer area. Is there anything you could do even on a volunteer basis that could help you network? Just an idea - this is something my university's career center suggests for students to do to help them find jobs. I hope you had a great Mother's Day! Hugs, Janet
IUPUI
I am so sorry.....I missed reading your journal since you so seldom write one.....I really feel for you!!! I hope things work out for you....you are in my prayers!! Big hugs!!!
BlueButterfly55