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Okiegirl 
8:50am, October 29, 2009
Well it has
Well it has been almost a month since I have journalled. I have not been on the DS web page regularly either. Partly because my computer is messing up but partly because I have been dealing with depression and a lot of fustration. I feel I am pulling out of both but who knows when it will all return. I try to take it "one day at a time" and be thankful for each good moment because that is realy all any of us have.
The passing of Michael Jackson and Farrah Faucett set me to thinking. Life can be over in an instant without any warning. I thought how beautiful Farrah was and then to be struck with something like anal cancer. It was so brave of her to share her experience. We have had several family member diagnosed with cancer in the past few years and have gone through tx. One even made it to that 5 year mark and we celebrated her being cured. She was diagnosed again with cancer within that year and we lost her. It is like we are holding our breath for the others that they will not have to face the illness again. It was so hard for me to watch "Farrah's Story" thinking about my loved ones. We just never know, do we.
As far as Michael Jackson's death, I felt a great sadness. I feel that he was haunted with a 'family secret' all his life. I know about family secrets and the pain and damage they can do in a person's life. Obviously it does not matter who you are or how rich you are, those secrets can destroy you and those close to you. I feel there are reasons for why people behave the way they do and I feel some one got away with harming Michael's soul. It is sad to me but I do believe that whoever or what ever was done will come to light eventually.
So this is what set me to thinking that we never know when we are going to meet eternity. I am trying to be thankful each and everyday. I am so blessed. It is so much more apparent after you have just come out of a bout of depression. My prayers are going out to all my special DS friends. I hope you are doing well and life is good for you. God bless and I am sending you each Much Love...Jackie
Comments
Thanks for your sweet words on Farraw, and especially for Micheal, whom I've loved since the first time he sang publically.
He was and still is my idol, I love the guy with a passion.
He was just one year younger than I, and grew up with his music, bought all of his vinyls, then DC's, some not even open yet.
I have realised by reading your profile, that we have so much in common.
1. alcohol, I used to love to drink, until diagnosed with hep c when I quit 10 years ago.
2. Anxiety, panic attacks, since doing treatment, over 5 1/2 years ago. It never left me.
3. Agoraphibia, I have been housebound since doing treatment, am doing a little better on that one lately, but still have to ush myself constantely to go ahead and go out and visit my family, that I have neglected for years now.
4. nightowl, I love getting up in the morning at 5am with my hubby, but then go back to bed for hours, since I probably spent the whole night up.
5. Type 2 diabetes, just diagnosed 4 weeks ago.
6. Have nothing but good to say about Micheal Jackson.
If someone can't say anything good about he might as well not say anything.
If you read my last journal entry, you will understand why I am back on 3 anxiety pills, instead of staying at one since a couple of months now, but had to start taking 3 again, due to having to go to court, testify against the man who attacked me during a home invasion Nov. 25th 08.
We had an electrical storm a week ago, and the modem on my new laptop was fried, so I managed to get my old dinosaur working, and I am back online.
Like I said, we have lots in common, just might go visit your Nightowl website.
Now you take care, love Mckenzie one day at the time.
Mckenzie
Hey Okie, I do the same thing, I withdraw when the depressions hit.
Yup, our lives are fragile. I wish I could remember to cherish every day. I try, but sometimes I forget or get distracted.
freeheeler